Instagram — our generation’s heroin.
Monday 07.15am
Can someone turn that bloody alarm off?! As I reach for my phone I slowly but surely try to wake up both body and mind. Come on Rosanna, you can do this! But no, this little cocoon of covers and pillows is too warm and too comfy. I need to give it a few more minutes. As I linger in bed with the phone still in my hand, I pop into Instagram and start scrolling through my feed. It literally takes me 2 seconds to step into an imaginary world of people with flawless skin, perfect bodies and a glow that shines brighter than Nicole Kidman’s dress in Moulin Rouge. And as they get ready to eat their 50-dollar breakfast on the porch of that sick beach villa in Bali, I roll out of bed realizing I just had my first fix of Instagram — And I feel like absolute shit.
OK, I know it’s pretty extreme to compare daily use of Instagram to a full-blown heroin addiction, but we need to open up to the fact that social media has taken a serious hold on us, just like any drug addict. Did you know for example that more people wanted to quit social media than quit smoking in 2018? Or that there are actual “Digital Detox Retreats” happening right this very moment? I know I didn’t.
When I created my Instagram account in 2012, it was a way for me to privately share photos of things I enjoyed with my friends and family. It’s actually kind of refreshing to look back and see how innocent my use of Instagram once was. The filters were absolutely horrible and at one point I managed to share not one, but two pictures of my bright yellow tube socks, for no reason at all. But as the social media platforms evolved, so did I. I started to push my own boundaries and tried new things to get more likes and comments on my pictures. You could no longer see photos of things that appealed to me, but more of what I knew others wanted to see. I retouched absolutely everything, took more selfies and, to be completely honest, posted pictures of my butt in teeny tiny bikinis (and there’s no Kimmy K going on over here!). I totally sold myself out for the “gram”. Instagram vs Rosanna, 1–0.
As embarrassing as all this might be I’m not blaming myself for losing my shit in this world of perfection.
We are constantly exposed to gorgeous photos of people “living the dream”, so it’s not surprising that we take extreme measures to try to fit in. To show that our lives are interesting and worthy of something. To show that we aren’t losers. We push our boundaries a little bit at a time and just like that, we’re completely sucked in. Just like someone going from having a beer to try drugs for the very first time, only to look “cool” in front of their friends.
My social media journey has been a long one. I’m on my 8th year as an Instagram user with no intention to stop scrolling through my feed in bed every morning to get that very first fix. I will keep looking at all the photos that are meant to inspire me, but let’s face it — Only gives me anxiety and a feeling of not being good enough. I will continue to go back to check my Instagram feed. Over and over again, no matter how it makes me feel.
So maybe the comparison of daily use of Instagram and a heroin addiction ain’t so far out after all…
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