Guilty until proven innocent
On how it feels to be treated like a criminal simply because I’m a man
I remember the first time somebody told me that when I walk down the street at night and there is a woman walking in front of me, I should cross to the other side so she doesn’t feel threatened. I don’t think I understood it at first. Why? What have I done? Have I become a known criminal without realizing it?
I was quite young and had no idea what a woman’s experience might be, what she might be feeling as she hears encroaching footsteps behind her at night. To be quite honest, I spent no time thinking about it at all, since I never considered my own footsteps to be particularly threatening. I mean, sure, I was aware that there are abusers out there who would attack a woman on the street, but I’m not one of them! In fact, it’s the opposite, as I have personal experiences of being mugged on the street by a bunch of thugs, and then also attacked a tram full of people who stood there and did nothing. So if anything, I would see myself as similar to her, not a potential attacker.
The next time I was out at night, I was extremely aware of the other people around me. Soon enough I found myself walking behind some girl. I remember the stress of it — am I walking too fast? Are my footsteps too heavy? I’m a fast walker so I kind of just…
