What a 10-year-old told me about pronouns
You can always change it back.
What does it mean when nothing is permanent?
If you’re in elementary school in 2023 America, you’re being told that gender is not only something you can choose but something that is ephemeral.
We used to be told, like yesterday, that not only are gender and biology not related, but gender is an immutable characteristic that requires “gender-affirming care,” aka puberty-blocking hormones and genital surgery.
Apparently, nobody is telling the children this when they are being introduced to the idea that gender can change by the day.
“No sweetie, puberty blockers are not something you can just change later.”
That actually is permanent.
Instability
Things change in life. People grow up, move away, people die, parents get divorced. We all know that certain things can change.
But we all need and strive for stability. A base. A foundation upon which we can make decisions and long-term plans.
Imagine growing up in a world where not even your own body is permanent.
Plenty of research has been done on the negative developmental effects of instability on children. Primarily this has focused on things such as divorce, poverty, and housing changes. But what about gender?
Research shows that preschool-aged children have already developed gender stability and by kindergarten/early elementary have obtained gender consistency.
By age three or four, children acquire gender stability, in which they understand that their gender is stable over time. Finally, by age five to seven, children acquire gender constancy, in which they realize that gender is for the most part unchangeable and that superficial indicators of gender, such as a boy wearing girls’ clothing, do not change gender.
So what happens when you take away one of the few foundational things that young children have figured out? Is that not introducing instability?
Nevermind the tragic tales of detransitioners, who are living with the consequences of decisions they weren’t prepared to make, and didn’t actually address their underlying issues.
That’s not the issue I’m addressing.
How are kids supposed to think about college, a career, marriage, and children (shock and horror) when you’re not even sure what gender you’re going to be next week?
How are you supposed to find yourself and your place among your peers when nothing, and no one, is permanent?
Oh, and just for fun, throw in the propaganda that the planet will be uninhabitable by the time you’re an adult. See what kind of psychology that produces in 20 years.
Cue the laments of, “If only we had known" and “We were trying to be supportive.”
It feels like we’re using children as unwitting props in a massive social experiment. The problem is, the results of this experiment are going to be massively consequential and nobody is talking about them ahead of time.