Marvel Retold: X-Men, Part Seven
Bobby Drake [exiting the local theater]: Man, I love Rent! I’ve seen it five times now and it keeps getting better!
Judy Harmon: If you love it so much, why don’t you marry it? Hahaha!
Bobby: Do — do you think I could? That’d be AMAZING!
Judy: Ha, no, I was just —
Bobby: I mean, we’re PERFECT for each other! I know all the songs by heart, I love both the stage and movie versions and I’m totally available!
Judy: … aren’t we… on a date right now?
Bobby: Oh! … uh, yeah, that’s right! Right, I asked YOU on this date! Haha! Listen, I’m TOTALLY into you. I don’t think I’ve ever cared for someone this deeply, this quickly. I think I love you, Jody!
Judy: Judy.
Bobby: Jody’s my little, y’know, pet name for you! See? We’re just so RIGHT for each other! You totally get me!
Judy: I really don’t.
Bobby: Well, no time for that now! Time to walk among the people and show them how proud I am to have a beautiful girl on my arm!
Judy: So, just… ‘a’ beautiful girl? Not me specifically? What am I, a trophy to you?
Bobby: N-no! ’Cause that would be WRONG! I, I… uh…
Thug: There ‘e is! Get ‘im, boys!
[A group of local toughs knock Bobby down, pummeling him mercilessly]
Bobby: Oh thank god
Thug: Think you’re better’n us? Huh? Steal our best girls? With your stupid haircut, your stupid clothes? Your stupid… stupid?
Judy: Rocky, stop it!
Rocky [kicking Bobby in the ribs]: Shut it, Judy! Good lookin’ dude comes into town outta nowhere… makin’ it hard for us regular joes to get dates!
Judy: It’s not his fault he has good hygiene! And dresses well! And speaks nicely! Yeah, it’s his fault.
Rocky: Punk’s had it comin’ for a long time now!
Bobby [rolling around, covering up, as his assailants continue to beat him]: Do I get to talk?
Rocky: Only if you’re gonna apologize!
Bobby: For what? Walking upright? Using tools? Why don’t you get some evolution, you neanderthal?
Rocky [stomping Bobby’s head]: See, utilizing pejorative language like that is why we’re takin’ you out!
Judy: … what did you just say?
Bobby [wincing in pain as several blows find their marks]: Judy, you’re letting them do this?
Judy: What do you want from me? They’re the alpha males of this town and I have to obey them!
Rocky: That’s right! See, moron? She knows her place!
[Rocky stalks over to Judy, roughly grabbing her by her hair]
Rocky: I don’t know what you thought you were doin’ out with this loser, but it’s time to pay the piper!
[Rocky forces her mouth to his]
Judy: Rocky, no! I told you, we’re OVER!
Rocky: You don’t get to decide that, baby. Shut up and enjoy it.
Bobby [from the ground, fending off two jocks]: HEY! Beat on me all you want, but leave her alone!
Rocky [grinning, pointing down at Bobby]: Or what, doofus? If you were more of a man, you wouldn’t be where you are now! C’mere, Judy, I missed you.
[Rocky forces himself on Judy, muffling her screams]
Bobby [gritting his teeth]: Damn you… I guess I’m right where I’m supposed to be.
[Bobby puts the palms of both hands flat on the ground, ignoring repeated unblocked strikes. A circle of frost widens from the point of contact, coating the cement in ice. Everyone standing slips and falls, some painfully.]
Rocky: What the hell’s…
[Bobby pushes off the brutes laying awkwardly atop him, and stands, extending his hands toward Rocky]
Bobby: I’ve never needed to do this more… and never wanted to less.
[Twin beams of ice push outward, completely enclosing Rocky in a man-sized ice block. Judy screams; Rocky’s fellow thugs freak out and split the scene]
Bobby [sighs]: And here we go.
Judy: Bobby, what… what, w —
Bobby: It’s okay, it’s okay…
Judy: What WAS that? What did you DO?
Bobby: It’s okay, Judy, please…
Judy: No! That wasn’t OKAY! You — you FROZE Rocky!
Bobby: I know.
Judy: You can’t DO that! You’re… are you a MUTANT?
Bobby: I don’t know, I guess maybe? But he was about to… he MADE me do it! I was protecting you!
Judy: But you MURDERED HIM!
Bobby: What? No! He’ll be fine, he’s just… he’s just… on hold for a bit until he thaws. C’mon, let me…
[Bobby tries to help Judy to her feet, but she scrambles away from him on all fours]
Judy: NO! Get AWAY from me! You’ll freeze me too!
Bobby: Judy, it’s not like that —
Judy: What kind of freaky… no! No, get away, and don’t ever come near me again! God, Bobby, I thought you were a sweet guy, but I never knew you… you…
[Judy runs off, leaving Bobby standing amidst melting sheets of ice. His chin quivers, his eyes well up, but he masters himself]
Bobby: Okay. This was gonna happen sooner or later. Time to say goodbye.
[Bobby sets off disconsolately]
TO BE CONTINUED, TRUE BELIEVERS
