Nex Benedict’s Death and Community Mobilization
By Sassafras Lowrey
Last month nonbinary/transgender indigenous sixteen-year-old Nex Benedict (he/they) of Owasso, Oklahoma was attacked by three older students in the girl’s bathroom of their high school. Nex died the day after the fight. The queer community has understandably been traumatized and horrified to learn about Nex’s death. It felt unreal that this was a news story that I was reading in 2024, and brought back memories of other attacks on queer people: Matthew Shepard’s murder in 1998 which I vividly remember learning about on the news, as well as Brandon Tina a young transgender man’s 1993 murder in Nebraska (which inspired the movie Boys Don’t Cry). Both of these horrific hate crimes ignited LGBTQ+ community mobilization, as well as a large and mainstream attention to the violence that queer people face. No amount of community mobilization can bring Nex back, but hopefully a strong community response will send a message that targeting of nonbinary/transgender people isn’t acceptable and prevent violence like this in the future.
What Happened
On February 7th, Nex was at school when they were attacked in the girl’s bathroom by three older students. Fox23, an Owasso, Oklahoma local affiliate news station shared text messages that Nex shared that day, the day before they died, with a family member. In the text messages, Nex explains that he had been jumped by three other students while at school. After being jumped, Nex was unable to walk to the nurse’s office without assistance, and yet the school didn’t call 911. Later, Nex’s family brought them to the emergency room. At that point a police statement was taken. Nex was released from the hospital that night, only to be rushed back to the hospital the next day when Nex died on February 8th.
Community Response
As if the brutal attack and death of Nex wasn’t horrific enough, the response from the adults in charge who should have helped, didn’t. An ambulance wasn’t called to the school even when Nex was unable to walk to the nurses’ office and his family had to bring him to the hospital. Then, local police initially made statements that Nex didn’t die because of the attack. This failed response understandably ignited a national community response demanding answers, justice, and accountability for Nex’s death. Students in Owasso responded to the inaction from the school and local police and organized a walkout at Owasso High School in protest of the pervasive bullying culture at the school. It has been confirmed by Nex’s mother as well as friends that Nex was bullied at school because of his gender identity/presentation. LGBTQ+ community members, organizations, and leaders across the country have and continue to speak Nex’s name and have called for a thorough investigation. Speaking up is our cultural legacy, this is what we do. We fight back, depend on action, and ensure that LGBTQ+ people are remembered and that their memory can help protect others.
A Culture of Violence
Nex’s attack at school and death are part of a larger culture of violence that nonbinary and transgender people face across the country. This is especially true for students in Oklahoma where the state has not only failed to protect them but been explicitly transphobic. In the last year, Chaya Raichik of “Libs of TikTok ‘’ was put onto the Oklahoma Library Media Advisory Committee with the expressed goal of removing LGBTQ+ and inclusive programming books from schools. Additionally, Oklahoma schools are also not legally able to have gender-neutral bathrooms and are required by law to have gender segregated bathrooms, with students being required to use bathrooms associated with their sex designation on their birth certificate, regardless of gender identity or presentation. When we talk about transphobic language being perpetuated online, and by politicians, Nex’s attack and death are the kinds of violence that are the natural consequence. Words have power, and when transphobic beliefs are platformed, real transgender and nonbinary people get hurt.
What Now?
A month after Nex’s death we still do not have answers. The police investigation continues, and local authorities have not named the fight at school as the cause of death. The Human Rights Campaign launched a formal complaint with the US Department of Education’s office for civil Rights, who has now begun a federal investigation into Nex’s death. LGBTQ+ organizers alongside Nex’s friends and family continue to keep the pressure on. This investigation could take months to complete, but the hope is that it will result in increased safety for LGBTQ+ students in schools. Advocates also hope that this federal investigation can also prevent similar horrifically tragic bullying and attacks from taking place. Rallies and memorials for Nex have taken place across the country bringing the community together to remember Nex and to speak out against the senseless transphobic violence that took his life. No student should experience violence at school, let alone lose their life as a result.
Nex should be here, he should be going to school, hanging out with their friends, and planning his future. While we can’t bring them back, we can continue to fight to make sure that other trans and queer students are safe in schools and in communities everywhere in this country. If you are being bullied in school, please know that you are not alone. Reach out for support to supportive teachers, administrators, family members, or LGBTQ+ organizations in your local area. Know that there are allies and community members across the country who are committed to protecting you and creating schools and communities where all transgender and nonbinary students are safe to be themselves.
About the Author
Sassafras Lowrey’s novels and nonfiction books have been honored by organizations ranging from the American Library Association to the Lambda Literary Foundation and the Dog Writers Association of America. Sassafras’ work has appeared in The New York Times, Wired, and numerous other newspapers and magazines. Sassafras has taught queer writing courses and workshops at LitReactor, the NYC Center For Fiction and at colleges, conferences, and LGBTQ youth centers across the country. You can find more of Sassafras’ written works, including an edited collection exploring LGBTQ+ youth homelessness entitled Kicked Out, at www.SassafrasLowrey.com.
