Remembering Matthew Shepard’s Dream 25 Years Later
By Sassafras Lowrey
It has been twenty-five years since Matthew Shepard was murdered, and changed the national conversation about hate crime protections for LGBTQ+ people. I was fourteen years old when Matt died and I clearly remember the evening news broadcast reporting from Wyoming, saying that a young gay college student had been kidnapped and badly beaten, and then the news saying that he had died. My family said he deserved what happened to him. I sat quietly. I was not yet out to anyone, not even myself. It sounds unbelievable now with the amount of LGBTQ+ representation that exists, but in 1998, there weren’t a lot of out gay people in the media. In fact, Matt’s death was the first time I saw a gay person on TV. Seeing Matt’s death on the news was a pivotal moment for me. I was afraid, but it also showed me that there were other queer people out there even if I didn’t see examples in my local community. The world that existed for LGBTQ+ people is completely changed over the last 25 years, and that in many ways can be credited to Matt. One of Matt’s dreams was to make the world a better place, and he has, for me, and so many other people who have come after him.
Matt’s Angels:
At Matt’s murder trial his friends and LGBTQ supporters wore angel outfits with huge wings to block out the hateful homophobic protestors. The angel counter protestors created a wall of angels to defend for Matt’s memory. This iconic image of peacefully drowning out hate is another image I remember seeing on the news around the time I was starting to come out to myself. It was comforting to see people standing up to protestors who said the kind of homophobic hate I regularly heard in the hallway of my high school. Matt has become an angel for the community, guiding a response not just in Wyoming, not just in the United States, but across the world. Matt’s memory has saved countless lives, has changed the way we understand hate crimes, and how we protect innocent and marginalized people. Matt’s story captivated the world. For many people, Matt’s murder brought hate crimes against LGBTQ+ people into their living rooms, and consciousness. Because of his family’s tireless work to keep his memory alive, Matt’s memory has taken on an angelic presence raising awareness and helping to protect LGBTQ+ people.
Matt’s Memory Is Changing the World:
In 2002, three years after Matt’s murder, I was seventeen, and ran-away from my homophobic childhood home. I built connections with other runaway and homeless LGBTQ+ youth and began building my own life. A couple of months after running away I had the opportunity to go to a community event with the homeless LGBTQ+ youth drop-in center to hear Judy Shepard speak about her work founding the Matthew Shepard Foundation to honor his life and keep his memory alive. Since its formation, the foundation’s goal has been to make the world a more accepting place for LGBTQ+ people, and create lasting structural change., A few years later I had graduated college, moved to NYC, and was working for LGBTQ+ nonprofits to advance social justice issues. I was also writing and sharing marginalized queer stories. My first book, Kicked Out , was an anthology of current and former homeless LGBTQ+ youth ranging from formerly homeless youth who came out pre-stonewall, to youth who were homeless at the time the book was published. While I was putting the Kicked Out anthology together I got an email I won’t ever be able to forget.. Judy Shepard wanted to write the forward for the anthology. In response to the 40% of homeless youth who identify as LGBTQ+ Judy wrote: “it is unacceptable for one young person to be forced to the streets for any reason… My son was taken from me because two men learned to hate — I certainly cannot imagine losing him by choice. Our children need and deserve better from us…Our community has a responsibility to take action — immediately.” This is just one very small way that Judy Shepard has lent her voice and passion to keeping Matt’s memory alive. Nobody would have blamed Matt’s parents if after his murder they stayed inside, holding tight to every memory they had of him. But that isn’t what they did. Judy and Dennis Shepard have done everything imaginable, and more to keep Matt’s memory alive, to uplift the LGBTQ community, and to see national hate crimes legislation pass in his name. Matt’s memory has changed not just the LGBTQ+ community, but also the world.
The Work Is Not Done:
The impact of Matt’s memory in so many ways has been sustained and maintained because of the tireless work of the Mathew Shepard Foundation to help create a world where the protections of marginalized people are now part of mainstream political discourse. The Matthew Shepard Foundation has become a national leader not just to remember Matt’s memory but to create lasting change through training law enforcement and prosecutors about hate crimes and lobbying for federal hate crimes legislation. Finally, in 2009 The United States passed the first Federal Hate Crimes Legislation: The Matthew Shepard and James Byrd, Jr., Hate Crimes Prevention Act. This landmark legislation took five congressional sessions to pass after first being introduced in 2001. After passing in 2009 it was then signed into law by President Barack Obama.
In October 2018, twenty years after Matt’s death my partner and I moved cross country, on our drive west we spent a night in Laramie. It wasn’t intentional, truth-be-told, I was nervous to stop there but it was the only option for hotels before we drove further west the next morning. This was the first time I’d been to Wyoming, and Laramie was more beautiful than I had ever imagined. One of my dogs chased tumbleweeds near our hotel, and I watched as the wide sky was painted in a breathtaking orange sunset. It was beautiful, and haunting. It was impossible for me not to think about Matt, and the night he was murdered two decades before. But I also was filled with a sense of hope, and peace thinking of how far we have come, and how we are working together to in Matt’s memory striving to make the world a better place.
About the Author:
Sassafras Lowrey’s novels and nonfiction books have been honored by organizations ranging from the American Library Association to the Lambda Literary Foundation and the Dog Writers Association of America. Sassafras’ work has appeared in The New York Times, Wired, and numerous other newspapers and magazines. Sassafras has taught queer writing courses and workshops at LitReactor, the NYC Center For Fiction and at colleges, conferences, and LGBTQ youth centers across the country. You can find more of Sassafaras’ written works, including an edited collection exploring LGBTQ+ youth homelessness entitled Kicked Out, at www.SassafrasLowrey.com.
