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Schitt’s Creek S6 E4 Recap: Bridesmaids

by Ian Carlos Crawford

Previously on Schitt’s Creek: Ted was kinda sorta back (Skyping Alexis) and he was lookin’ handsome as hell with a beard. Stevie gets a job as a flight attendant and Moira and Johnny end up going into business with Roland and Jocelyn.

Now that we’re on episode 4, I feel like I need to be upfront with y’all. I watched the first season and half of the second when all Netflix had was two season and thought, “This show isn’t really for me.” I thought the memes/gifs/content I saw on Twitter were funny enough but felt almost no desire to go back to the show. “I got the point,” I foolishly thought.

Then I saw the clip on Twitter of our beloved Alexis Rose singing her iconic breakaway pop hit, “A Little Bit Alexis.” Then my best friend would text me to say I really needed to get back into it. During the incredibly depressing summer of 2019, I thought, “Sure why not,” and started again with season two.

I, of course, fell madly in love with the Rose family and sobbed my way through almost the entirety of season 5. So, what I’m getting at is, this final season is actually my first time watching it live. Every episode feels shorter than the one before it. Maybe it’s just because I know it’s the final season and want more time with the Rose clan. Or maybe it’s because I often watch the show for hours as background and am used to the show being an hours long event.

With that being said, this week’s episode felt incredibly short. Like more-so than usual. Alexis wears the same fantastic outfit with fantastic huge hoop earrings for the entire episode! That has to mean it was short, right?

We open with the family crowding around Moira’s computer to watch the just-released trailer for The Crows Have Eyes III: The Crowening. It’s a cute to see the usually-incredibly-confident Moira be so nervous. Of course, an ad pops up and Moira has no idea what’s going on. Then the video ends up buffering — again confusing Moira.

We then learn David keeps a wedding journal under his pillow because Alexis found out and is, of course, looking through it. Alexis mentions that in this childhood dream journal, David had named Dharma & Greg’s Jenna Elfman and *NSYNC’s JC Chasez as his partners of choice. Alexis then makes an Atonement reference but I never saw that movie.

David reveals to Alexis that because she was supposed to be gone with Ted right now, he had asked Stevie to be his maid of honor. Alexis handles the news fairly well but also then says she’ll help them reverse it since she’ll be home. Then they pick Stevie up from her flight attendant job and David references the show Pan AM, which I honestly hadn’t thought about in years. Stevie is running out on the new job because it sounds like a mess. Stevie comes with Patrick, David, and Alexis to help Patrick get fitted for a tux. Stevie mentions how being a bridesmaid is the only job she’s really been looking forward to and Alexis, in a shocking but lovely turn of events, says she thinks Stevie will be great at it and can help her if she needs it. Then gently guides Stevie to pick the right tie for Patrick, by not letting go of the wrong one.

The other plot is Moira shows the Jazzigals her new trailer. Everyone seems excited but Jocelyn. The movie looks like caca but Jocelyn has trouble even pretending. Twyla is actually excited and Ronnie asks the right questions. Jocelyn basically says, “It’s a movie!” Moira’s feelings are hurt and by the end, we actually get a very cute moment where Jocelyn reads a new review she wrote of the trailer — a thing I hope pops back up. Like, I hope at the end of the season Moira has the ability to hire Jocelyn to ghostwrite for her or something. Wouldn’t that be a nice?

Then in the weaker plotline, Johnny and Roland find a squatter living in one of the rooms in their newly purchased hotel. They do a stakeout that, on any other show, I might’ve been worried about. They confront the squatter and he says he’s a prosecutor who has always lived there and it’s in the contract. Oops, Roland didn’t read it! Will this dude be coming back because he felt like a character who might come back later?

But more importantly, we circle back to David and Alexis at the end. They’re discussing what just transpired. David mentions how out of character it was for Alexis to willingly give up the Maid of Honor position to Stevie. Alexis agrees it’s out of character. Then David mentions he has been thinking and really wants Alexis to be the one to give him away and I immediately let out a weird happysad groan of, “ooooh” when we saw Alexis’s face not knowing how to take in the really touching thing David had asked.

So, here we are again. Crying at Schitt’s Creek.

Best Moment: David asking Alexis to be the one to give him away.

Favorite Outfit: The giant hoops, ‘A’ necklace, red lipstick, giant bracelets, and cute sundress Alexis wears for the entire episode. But also Moira’s ridiculous headdress for when she’s showing the gals her trailer.

Question I still have about The Crows Have Eyes III: The Crowening based on the trailer we saw: Why is Moira’s character making crow noises before the crows attack and before she’s seemingly turned into a crow-person?

About the Author:

Ian Carlos Crawford grew up in southern New Jersey and, like most people from NJ, he graduated from Rutgers University. He then graduated from New School with an MFA in nonfiction writing. His writing has appeared on sites like Geeks Out, BuzzFeed, NewNowNext, and other random corners of the internet. He currently co-hosts a podcast about his favorite thing, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, called Slayerfest 98 and is shopping around his fiction manuscript. Follow him on Twitter @ianxcarlos

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