What We Look For
This month for MatthewsPlace, bloggers Valerie Scarlett and Leonardo Ronaz will be doing a column on ‘Things We Look For in a Relationship’. The column will be in an interview format, and to discern writer from writer, fonts will be either in bold (Leo) or italics (Val!). So, without further ado, let’s get started!
1) What sounds more appealing to you, a night out, a romantic dinner, or a stay-at-home movie night
“I’m a pretty outgoing person, so I honestly would love a night out. A romantic dinner could be nice as well, but I’m more into having fun. That, and there would nothing more fun than to show off my theoretical boyfriend to the world. :)”
“Most definitely stay-at-home movie night. I would prefer to do something fun and with minimal stress. A night out would involve planning and being around other people, and a romantic dinner would be okay, but you could make dinner at home together, which would be more fun than going out.”
2) What would be your ideal restaurant to eat out at? McDonald’s, Arby’s, Burger King?
“Ummm…I’m a vegetarian…So I’d hafta go for Chinese. Although I’ve heard that Indian food is really good, too. :)”
“I would like to start out by saying that my town does not have an Arby’s or a Burger King, or the majority of other chain restaurants. We have 4,000 people, three stop lights, and basically no vegetarian options. Since I have recently become a vegetarian, I would have to say that I would rather stay at home and make my own food. Plus, if I found a significant other who would cook for me, I would be down for a second date. #DIY”
3) What are some activities/hobbies you would refuse to do with your significant other?
“Well I definitely would not go to a country/hip-hop/heavy metal concert. That would never happen. I also can’t say that I would kiss him in front of his ex to make him jealous. That would just be childish. :) I dunno, I guess there’s a lot of things that I wouldn’t want to do. Argue with his mother, take care of his pets, have sex in a taxi, wear ‘I’m His’ T-shirts,…I mean the list just goes on ahahaha.”
“I feel like I would refuse to watch any sports of any kind. I would also never do a couples retreat. That sounds like a literal hell on earth. I would 100% never go camping with their family. I have no idea why, but it just sounds like a bad idea. Matching Halloween costumes are a no go as well. Honestly, the list goes on and on.”
4) If there was one thing that you would HAVE to have in common with a romantic interest, what would that one thing be?
“Music. Definitely. So that I could listen to it with him in our free time, and play him something of my own in our more intimate time. Maybe we could fall asleep together while listening to a melodious ballad. :)”
“First things first, they must be a massive homosexual. After that, it would be great if they could appreciate and share my interest in music, musical theatre, and social rights activism.”
5) What is your favorite genre of movie?
“Romance. Hands down. I just am the biggest sucker for a well done LGBT romance. Other than that though, I tend to love dramatic comedies.
“... Comedy Musicals? If I find someone who will sit down and watch “A Very Potter Musical” or any other StarKid musical with me, I will marry them on the spot. ”
6) What is a pet name you would never let your partner call you?
“A pet name? Hmm…I’m pretty chill for the most part, but I absolutely HATE baby talk. (Lovey dovey, that sorta of thing)”
“I dislike the pet name baby. Babe is fine, but baby is the absolute worst. When I hear it, I actually cringe. I also dislike pumpkin, and sweetie.”
7) What is a deal breaker with you and your significant other?
“A deal breaker for me would absolutely be smoking. Smoker’s breath is the worst. Nothing against them of course, just not something I would want to be around. On that note, I suppose it wouldn’t be too much of an issue, just so long as they didn’t expect ME to do it along with them. Some other deal breakers might be bad habits, such as throwing dirty items on the floor, Umm…I hate when I don’t find people are paying that much attention to when I open up, so FOCUS would be a big seller for me. OH and I HATE when people smack. Their. Lips. On food. Typically it translates to myself getting irritated very quickly. ;) And DON’T get me started on people who constantly feel the need to look up information to validate that the things I tell them are correct….GRR. (Had a boyfriend that was like that once.)”
“If someone has a whiny personality, I can not deal. I also can’t handle when someone feels the need to justify everything they do, and always have to be right. I have a hard time with people who feel the need to talk all the time. I love sitting in silence with other people; I feel that you get to know them a little better than if you were to consistently talk. An absolute deal breaker for me, is someone who has no interest in what is going on around them. We all impact each other in ways that we do not know, and I could never be with a person who does not see the bigger picture of the world around them.”
8) What are some key points that you find ATTRACTIVE about a potential romance?
“I think it’s honestly pretty attractive when a guy looks at me when I’m speaking. I feel that it means that he is paying attention, and has some genuine care about the things that I have to say. I also love someone who is honest to a fault, but isn’t so predictable that I find myself caught off guard by some of the things he says. There’s just something about spontaneity that rubs me the right way. Physical appearance doesn’t concern me too much, I might dress like an uptight schoolgirl myself on occasion, but certainly don’t expect the same out of others. Weight isn’t much of a concern to me, and book smarts aren’t too big of a concern to me, either. Hmm…I like blue eyes, men who are roughly the same height as I am, maybe shorter, (Though at a measly 5’6” that isn’t too common) a good sense of humor is always a plus, and I would prefer if they had at least SOME of the interests that I have. Common ground isn’t a necessity, but it does make for some less unorthodox conversation topics.
“As cliche as it sounds, I find humor insanely attractive. I gravitate towards people who have outstanding senses of humor. I also tend to find people who are compassionate and caring very attractive. I also look for someone who isn’t clingy & doesn’t feel the need to be around me 24/7. I genuinely find people who are socially aware & informed very, very, very attractive. I am also a massive homosexual, so I also look for some one of the female gender.”
9) Would you be more willing to try different things if they were suggested by a significant other?
“Yes! Definitely! I am not too terribly outgoing, but I tend to find that my personality changes depending on whether or not I am with other people. Would I try something crazy like skydiving? A solid ‘maybe’ but I think the odds are much better, if I’m looking at my significant other when I make the decision.
“Ahhhhh, this one is a hard one. I am not very good at trying new things. I am a creature of habit. I believe in trying new things and always being adventurous, but it is easier said than done. I might be more encouraged to go out of my comfort zone with some persuasion from a significant other.”
10.) Would you date someone if they were not out of the closet yet?
“Ah…a difficult question is this. I think the best answer to this would be ‘intermittently’. Because if they aren’t out of the closet then I technically wouldn’t be dating them because they haven’t really come to terms with who they are quite yet. But of course I would do my very best to give them the support and resources that they need should they ever need it, and do my best to assure them that they are not alone. Hopefully should a circumstance such as this ever arise, I can help them to the best of my abilities, and who knows, ‘dating’ may be what lures them to take that first step. :) Of course in the long run, if they never did come out…then I may have to take that first step and tell them that I would need more out of them, to have them know that I would prefer not having to cover up for them in the bigger picture. Not in a selfish way, but in a proactive and self loving way for them. If you aren’t out, then you probably have a lot more self-exploring to do, and that I simply cannot provide for somebody else…”
“I am the type of person who would love to say “yes.” That nothing could keep me from the person I love and blah blah blah, but in reality, the answer would probably be no. I couldn’t date someone while they are still in the closet. I would love to remain their friend and help them through the process of coming out, but I could not romantically be involved with them. It may sound a little selfish, but I can’t do that to myself; I will not be someone’s secret. It also wouldn’t be fair to the other person as well. It is hard enough to conceal your sexuality without a another human to add to the equation. I wouldn’t want to mess anything up for them, if that makes sense”
…and now you guys have a little bit more insight to how others think when it comes to relationships, and what we find interesting and intriguing in others. Of course, everybody will think differently, and feel differently, and have different answers depending on their personalities, and that is OK. Everyone is different, and we can’t wait to hear your answers to some of these popular interview style Q&A’s. :)
If you ever wanna know anything else, you can contact us @
LeoLeWolferoux@gmail.com (Leonardo Ronaz)
OR
valerie.scarlett98@gmail.com (Valerie Scarlett)
