Normal vs. Not-Normal
Relationships have become more than meeting a new person or getting matched by your family and friends. We live in a digital age of online dating and social media. Once we have met someone or found someone we go through this phase of talking which includes hanging out going on dates till a person gets to be their significant other. With this most people, have found a person that they want to be with as long term. They get engaged and then they are married some time later. This is what relationships are to us. But there is a concept of mail order brides, where men and women are now allowed to select a suitable mate and get married to them without going on a date. They learn more and more about each other as they are married.
Nicole Constable a professor at the University of Pittsburg stated in her book, “Romance on a Global Stage” “Western men correspond with Asian women for many different reasons. Among them is often a stated preference for a so-called traditional labor, one that is imagined or remembered from parents’ or grandparents’ generation.” (pg.66, Constable) We are in a generation where the women are working harder and harder to be self-sufficient they hire people to cook the food and take care of their children so they can work those long days. Coming from a traditional Indian family, my mom instilled at a very young age that we need to balance both a work life with a home life. Most like other Asian cultures where people are thought to do the same. “Women do not necessarily experience household duties and responsibilities as punishment, drudgery, or exploitation. Nor do they necessarily associate gender inequality with men’s idea about their own dominance.” (pg.67, Constable) Asian women when marrying someone out of their own race want the freedom and the ability to work and have a social life. Meanwhile, Women ask for help and get helped instead of having to do everything while their man sits around and does nothing.
American men are more willing to let their wives have a better job than them and for the men to take the kids to all the activities and help with dinner. Wives can work longer and not have to worry about taking time off from work because of their husbands.