The Trobrianders of Papua New Guinea: Life of Adolescent Behavior
The notes and research files on this subject is most fascinating to me because I compare the authors notes and ideas to that of North-American society. Growing up in a catholic household pre-marital sex was forbidden. Quite different among the youth in Trobrianders — the system of boy-girl relationships is well defined and regulated here. Within each village, everyone knows everything about everyone. The average age girls and boys sleep with each other is around thirteen but the adage is their lovers must be from the same village not another. Sometimes, to show some expression, gratitude, or even interest in another is by giving the other person yams. Yams in general is a huge trade item amongst the villagers and community. In general, when you give anything to someone its considered planning for the future. Giving expresses not only caring but intention as well. Offering items communicates a person’s desires and plans, sometimes it could be a way to be in debt to the recipient. But, in most cases, men who are interested in a girl will give the female yams to show interest and possibly invest in a future with that person. With young people in the Trobriander’s community, their strategies for influencing others are sharply developed during adolescence. Sometimes its more than just influencing another individual through trade and other kinds of material. Sometimes its purely their youthful physical and social beauty, made even more potent with love and “beauty” magic. Whats keen to point out especially about women during this time is that some will wear shell decorations to indicate social status. The decorations can be laced with coconut oil enhanced with “magic” to attract men. Its amazing how accepting sexuality is amongst the Trobrianders. Throughout the text they encourage young men and women to be sexually active as early as possible. By the time children are seven or eight, they begin playing erotic games with each other and imitate adult seductive attitudes.
Like most adolescences they all go through phases with each other, a rendezvous may be arranged at a certain location, but these are brief meetings without any commitment to further encounters. Most young adults will not live with their parents they usually go to their lover’s house that way they have the freedom and privacy to do as they wish. Throughout the days while they work in the village they can send messages back and forth usually in sexual metaphors that expresses a person’s intentions. Just like in North-America and its western customs, young women are just as assertive and dominant as men in their pursuit or refusal of a lover. It’s truly a singles retreat in these villages because of the overall acceptance of how early a young girl or boy can express their sexuality. All of them spend time in adorning themselves in preparation for the walking about or pursuit of a lover. The young must be careful in what they wear and how they convey themselves. One can easily mistake another for being too proud or dominant. Even when one is complimented. Who ever complimented that person needs to repay so that the favored person does not become “too confident.” What’s more so intriguing is that for a relationship to prosper and last longer young men must provide gifts like betal nuts and tobacco to the women they want, expressing their ability to continue to give presents in order for the relationship lasts.
Although, this could be a waste of time for the man, the women can still accept the gifts but she may tease the man and not go to bed with him. Sometimes giving isn’t enough, and use of “love magic” must be used to overcome opposition. Like how we learn in most societies we learn from the elders who have knowledge of their experience. The Young Trobrianders will seek “love magic” for a price, usually in a form of tobacco, yams, and food for the spells. This may last a few years to fully learn his or her mentor’s spells. To really explain this the “magic” comes from a variety of sources, but mainly it’s the words in the songs, used to entice your potential lover. Some specific words for beauty magic are chanted into coconut oil, which is then rubbed on the skin or into flowers and herbs that decorate armbands and hair.
Their main objective is to heighten the visual and olfactory effects of a person’s body to create erotic feelings on the part of the lover. But to understand, not all spells work, and some will fail to which the suitor will need to try another form or magic or apparel. Which, in retrospect, is the same style or method is commonly used in North-America today — if that perfume or pick up line fails another method will be used. Finding a lover is not too hard, as far as quick meet ups, late night hangouts, and secret location meetings, the real challenge however is the commitment. On average, the youth will consider marriage at one point in the relationship — but the relationship must at least have lasted longer than a year. Gossip will spread and high expectations are to be met within the villager’s culture. When a woman has only met with one “friend” periodically and rejected others the magic may have been a strong attraction. The father could decide if his son should marry his lover or not. Sometimes men will not marry their first or second love which is also true for women. A lot of times the youth will seek the elders and ask which individual would be fit for them. Which comes to my main point that during this phase for all youth it’s vital. In a sense, they’re learning who they are and what their capable of, and learning their desires in the world. I think its smart that the Trobrainders allow their youth to engage in this activity at an early age. Most would see that as inappropriate but in this primitive society it is welcomed.