Because I Got High: The (un)Conscious Community
As I left work from my downtown office in Portland, Oregon, I walked past the Greyhound bus station to get to my vehicle. I cannot describe the pain that I feel as I walk down 6th Avenue and see the two blocks of Black folks, young and old, men and women, lost as they chase their crack cocaine addictions. Among them you will find one or two cleaner looking individuals; those are the dealers, the hustlers. They too are lost.
Saddened by the sight and the plight of my fellow Black people I am hit with anger. I am angry that so many of my people are so hurt and burdened that they’ve given up on life. I’m pissed seeing beautiful Blackness wasting away on the block. And sadly, I am pissed that the same criminal injustice system that kills us and throw us in jails by the thousands act like they don’t see the madness happening. Rather, they allow it at this Greyhound bus station in downtown Portland so the city can see its ruin. See, I know that they are aware that those brothas and sistas are already incarcerated… in their minds.
I want to be very clear, I have used more drugs than I can remember. I have been drunk to blackout status. I know the struggle and come from a family of addiction, abuse, abandonment, and every other dysfunction that society has helped shape in Black families and communities. But it is time we stopped being left unconscious from their drugs and alcohol.
In truth, the folks at the Greyhound station weren’t always in such a bad way. They were young and full of life at one point in time. They lived and laughed and had dreams. But the illusion of escape through substances and alcohol got them by the collar and never let go. This is a huge problem for our communities as we think of having a Pan-African conscious community. Let me explain.
Think of our “movements” in America. I quote movements because they really only move so far and then end up reversing course completely in many cases. When we were thriving as a community prior to and shortly after the Civil Rights phenomenon, what was one of the major shifts in the country to thwart our efforts? You guessed right if you thought of the drug epidemic that followed. All of a sudden our streets were flooded with dope; heroin, cannabis, and cocaine being the main drugs of choice.
On one hand, you had an insane influx of money running through the community with the dealers riding Cadillac’s and wearing clean threads. The neighborhood kids finally has someone who resembled them to look up to. Families were being taken care of and false sense of pride was being held by some members of the Black community. We were making a way out of no way.
One the other hand you had a community dying from within. Zone and territory wars began. Our folks became strung out on greed, capitalistic individualism, drugs, and violence. And don’t forget the proverbial nail in the coffin; the war in drugs.
While we were so unconscious using drugs to get money and abusing drugs to escape a world that didn’t seem to want or need us, Dem People (the police) were busy locking us up in droves. See, we ended up perpetrating and perpetuating our own demise. We gave our enemies a talking point to show that WE were the problem, not the system. Our communities crumbled and was displayed nationwide to further the propaganda of Blacks being bad for society; and all for a high.
How has this affected the conscious community should be evident. We have lost so many warriors to drugs in one way or another. How can one educate himself and reach the masses when they are seeking the next high? How can mothers and fathers raise their children to be conscious of their Blackness when they’re high or in jail?
What’s most insidious about drug culture in America is that it has become this cool thing in our community. For instance, I was listening to the radio (which I try to avoid), and with my kids in the car, no less, a song comes on saying-I may misquote this- “I don’t really do this -less I’m drunk or I’m high and I’m both right now……” This is on public radio and I’m sure thousands of Black babies singing it, just nurturing a disease and eating up propaganda. We are at war, family.
Our kids, and some adults, need to understand that those drugs aren’t for our use. Alcohol is not meant for our bodies. And they damn sure better not consider using tobacco, the same tobacco that their ancestors picked to make this country the wealthy nation that it is today.
In conclusion, I want to implore everyone to not just say no to drugs; say yes to US! We need everyone focused and with a sound mind. Besides, how can you benefit from and help the conscious community when you’re in a constant state of loss of consciousness? Peace!
-Umoja N. Black
