Just Write.

Easy for ‘them’ to say, and not so easy to do when you have been sitting on all your ideas and thoughts for about 6 years. I have been holding back all the feelings, without even a share in my dearest journals about what is really in my heart and on my mind.

I’m wondering if it is much like why I also hold back tears — it keeps the pain at bay. In that sense, I guess I have been walking around with big band-aids on since I moved to a new city, attempting to ‘settle down’ again after my travels and having had my daughter, who is now two and a half. And these big changes were after several other big life changes — leaving a 16-year relationship, a 13-year career and the city I lived in for 19 years.

There have been smatterings of writing (usually shared on an occasional social media post) since I packed a bag, left Australia and traveled through India. An occasional fleeting moment of soul-freedom, travel-wisdom and heart-felt clarity… yeah, I wrote some of them down. I will go back and find them, feel some of those feelings again.

But lately I have been spending some time listening to my gut again, paying attention to those fleeting thoughts and ideas about my passions. I realise what I want is for writing to be in my life — to be as much a part of my day as my food and sleep.

I recently read a book called “Stop doing that S*#t” by Gary John Bishop. He is really good at helping you dig deep into your past, to question why you do what you do, work out why you sabotage your life (to not do the things you really want to) and how to get cracking on the things you really do want to do. I dug deep, I saw, I felt… and here I am.

Just Start.

That’s what ‘they’ also say. So, I begin. I feel raw and ready… a good a time to lay my soul out there and start getting a feel for sharing the journey via writing, which is what my gut is telling me to do.

I hope that by sharing my journey (past and present), together we will lighten the emotional load and participate in the ‘to and fro’ of life together. Some say ‘ups and downs’ — but it definitely feels more like a ‘to and fro’ for me. The constant back and forth in everything I do… I have a win, then a new challenge appears; I get something done, then another job to do arrives. And it feels never ending — a rhythmical tidal push and pull of life as a single mum, working multiple part time jobs, starting my own business, attempting a skerrick of social life, while trying to be a good daughter, a supportive friend and a conscious member of society.

A wise person recently reminded me, “ there is no ‘perfect’ ”, just do it. They all say “ just start ”. So instead of waiting for the perfectly timed moment or the most inspirational piece of writing to flow out of me, I am just doing it.

Hello. I am Melinda Lee Harvey.