The Unwritten Rules in a Narcissistic Family
While every family has rules, those in a narcissistic family are more intense, one-sided and must be followed at all costs.
In every family, there are both spoken and unspoken rules for everyday life. Growing up, you learn these rules through the reactions you get from others in the family. Maybe you came to understand that there was no jumping on the beds, to be quiet in the mornings when mom and dad were still sleeping or not play ball in the house.
In healthy families these rules can be seen to have logical explanations. As children, even when we don’t like the rules, we can understand their purpose in our life. We make not want to go to bed when we are supposed to, but we also know that when we don’t, we are tired and unhappy the next day.
The rules in healthy families are intended to serve all the members even though some may only apply to certain people. If a child is exhausted and miserable from lack of sleep, they can make everyone else miserable as well. They also serve to help the child learn how to function in society and to grow up to be a well-adjusted adult who has their own life separate from that of their parents.
In narcissistic families, the rules are intended to serve the purpose of the…
