Exercising The Brain
Well I’ve been in therapy since September 2018, but have been in therapy in other times throughout my life. I’ve also seen/met with a psychiatrist when I was young in Brampton.
I’m also gonna be seeing a new psychiatrist in Georgetown at the North Halton Mental Health Clinic next month (April 21) for some major mental health issues and see what they recommend to be changed.
Anyway, I’ve been working on DBT in therapy since fall 2019. And it’s honestly so hard when I don’t have my “voices” in other words, my thoughts are no longer present inside my head/brain. And without my voices/thoughts, I seem to struggle and fail at things completely.
By having my voices and the times I’ve had them, they’ve helped me achieve tasks: by helping me by communicating with me (reminders of what each step is and moving from step 1 to step 2), to everything else we do as humans. Having these voices, thoughts present in my mind, helps me accomplish so much more.
And regardless of whether someone has depression, any other mood disorder, including anxiety, PTSD (C-PTSD: Complex-Post Traumatic Stress Disorder: known for those who have lived through traumatic pasts with abuse: domestic abuse: physical, mental, emotional) or is a normal human being, if you have your thoughts/voices present in your mind, they help you achieve things more easily.
That also nag ones along and connected with your memory too. Your memory plays the part of remembering what you need to do, your voices helps remind you and helps you complete each task, one step at a time. Memory helps in ways of helping you remember things you need to do for the day, and anything that you need to plan for, write down, record, organize, complete, etc.
Without having them, it’s honestly so hard. And I’m one of many others out there in our home planet we call Earth 🌏 who live with this effect of depression, anxiety, ADD & C-PTSD.
To me without my voices/thoughts that help me accomplish tasks, etc; it makes it so much harder. And honestly I never thought 💭 that circumstances or scenario can result in the loss of one’s thoughts, aka voices. I knew that it was possible to numb one’s emotions/feelings/moods when living/suffering with depression.
But this I never thought was possible. And when I first noticed this beginning to take effect, I was freaking out and seriously 😳 wondering what was going on with my brain and my thoughts/voices. And this was around July 2018.
So I’ve lost connection to my voices completely and a couple other important points to mention here:
I’ve lost the ability to be impacted by the benefits of a “filter” you know that voice in your mind that helps you decide what you “should” or “shouldn’t” say or do…? That one.
Another point is that I’ve lost my connection to my memories: the things I’ve already accomplished in almost 5 years in recovery, the methods I used to recover with and/or without therapy and medication, and much else.
By not having these things that I’ve mentioned here, makes it so hard to live MY life, especially while living at home still at age 23 (24 in late October) with a complicated home life: emotionally abusive parents.
But gladly we started attending family therapy sessions. We had our first one January 17, 2020. And we have our next one tomorrow (Wednesday March 11, 2020).
