Self Help Books Are Nothing To Be Ashamed Of!

There should be not shame for getting help from books or educational resources!

Attitude is defined as “a state of mind or feeling with regard to some matter or position.” A positive attitude merely means that you believe in yourself; you believe that you have the power to make positive things happen in your life.

When it comes to self help in all forms, there has been so much shame put on seeking or asking help when in need of it. For seeking help is the one thing that saves us from absolute self destruction in a way that prevents suicide.

There’s also a huge stigma around suicide yet society has chosen to view suicide as the high rate and wonder how it got to be so high. They are a huge portion, most of it that brought the suicide rate to be so high. If you wan the suicide rate to be lower, start contributing your part in the process.

If you don’t know how, research it online, learn about what you can do to reduce the suicide rate. Go to the library, ask professionals who specialize in the mental health area and start doing your part and make healthier yet positive change. Start a campaign, host an event, advertise all around school, campuses, other buildings, host fundraisers and give the money to mental health initiatives, like Bell Let’s Talk.

Bell Let’s Talk yearly event is coming up: January 25th, 2017! There’s an opportunity for you to contribute another small yet very appreciated act in the “invisible illness epidemic” (mental health).

Seeking up either through books, online or specialized professionals like therapists, counsellors; is nothing to be ashamed of. No matter what society still continues to view as taboo and shameful, seek help anyway.

You will save your own life by seeking help. And you cannot be afraid but yet in order to get healthy, positive change in any area of life, you are gonna have to be open to feeling uncomfortable and taking risks.

You should never demand or force any kind of change on anyone or anything. No matter how badly you want it, you have to work on it slowly and gradually and naturally, you’ll start noticing positive results yet change.

I know this from plenty experiences of mine. How? Well I wanted to start taking risks particularly with my mental health advocacy, beliefs, values, priorities and my mental condition that I live with by standing up for them all and advocating for mental health.

So I did what I did to demand or in other words, force that kind of change. But did I get the change I wanted? No, why? Because I demanded it. If you want any kind of positive change, you have to accept, respect, understand and follow through on the belief that you cannot force or demand change in reality.

Forcing or demanding change only makes the situation yet overall life more worse yet unhealthy in all ways possible. Through challenging times, we all too easily go with our emotions. But we think and believe that we are going with logic more rather than emotion. But we actually don’t have any real logical reason behind that belief to back it up.

Remember what our teachers told us yet reminded us to do with our school work? Cite your sources. Whether its for a presentation powerpoint, an essay or anything else, you have to cite your sources that you used to proof many points in your work.

In power points, you cite your sources on one of the final slides. And on essays or other literature forms of work, you add the sources at the bottom or where asked/recommended by your teacher or professor.

So next time any situation comes along, ask yourself “how should I handle this?” And other times ask yourself “how have I handled previous situations: with logic or emotion?”

As scary as it may be ourselves as individuals are the only ones who can save ourselves. No one can read our minds. So you want to start in the beginning on your long journey in recovery, you have to tell someone.

Whether it’s a friend you trust and feel comfortable talking about anything to, a family member, therapist, doctor. Someone. You gotta speak up if you want change.

When it comes to our health, we don’t always know what to do. Some of us think that someone whether it’s ourself or someone we know or love, regardless of how many meds their doctor prescribed and recommended them take for their issue(s), go with what the doctor says. You or someone may think that it’s too many meds to take.

But think about it: you have to do whatever you gotta do to heal yourself whether it’s a wound, a broken heart (physically or mentally) a broken body part or organ to anything else that we use any kind of medical advice and action to heal ourselves back to normal and healthy again.

Make sure you love yourself first before you love others. – Demi Lovato

When it comes to love, we never think about loving ourselves unconditionally. Why is that? If we don’t love ourselves in all areas of self love, we aren’t fully able to love anyone else and that also includes kindness, care, attention and all else that is all part of emotional intelligence. When we fully love ourselves in all areas, we are then able to love others and all else as listed above.

Life is not as long as we may think it is. So why waste any minute of it not being truly authentic to yourself and others, standing up for yourself, making something of yourself, discovering yourself, finding your hobbies, passions, and life purpose?

Sometimes it just feels so amazing to finally stand up for yourself. I highly recommend it. Life is too short to be taken for granted. – Demi Lovato

Perfect is so overrated. Imperfect is the new black. Nothing in life should ever be perfect. Things, objects, events, projects, pieces of art, overall human beings, should not be expected like society expects all humans to be perfect. Nothing is perfect including humans. So why expect anyone or anything in reality to be.

Carson Kressley has many knowledgeable intelligence on the definition of perfect and reality:

When I was doing “How To Look Good Naked,” the hardest part for each women was that first moment when we’d stand together in front of all those mirrors and take a totally candid look at her body – never to criticize, but to be honest about what we were working with – big butts, big thighs, round bellies, – and go from there. One of the most positive and exciting transformations that can take place at the mirror is when a women begins to understand that she actually looks better than she thinks she does. And that most parts of her body rock in some way or another. That incredible moment at the mirror is when someone finally sees a path to saying “I love myself for who and what I am, and I’m going to choose to feel beautiful and confident” – and meaning it.

Why is it so important to change how you see yourself? Because it will change how you feel and act and live your life each and every moment of each and every day.

Of course they do. Despite our doubts and some actual differences (like having the benefits of the best lighting, the best photographers, and all the airbrushing and photoshopping that money can buy – you know, no biggie!) they’re just like us. Meaning: they’re not perfect either.

They beauty ideals you’re measuring yourself against and always feeling like you’re falling short of – absolutely perfect skin, perfect hair, and perfect bodies – are impossible to achieve because even the models posing in those pictures don’t actually look like that in real life!

And if they don’t really look like that in real life, then how can you expect yourself to?

Love is louder than the pressure to be perfect – Demi Lovato

Instead, live up to your own ideal by taking inspiration from the only person you can truly give it to you: you. Follow my Three Self-Esteem Commandments to really start to transform they way you see yourself: embrace what’s great about yourself, accept what’s not so great about yourself and decide to be the best and most amazing version of yourself that you can possibly be:

  1. Honor thy curves, laugh-lines, and stretch marks if you have them.
  2. Covet not thy neighbor’s tiny waist, wrinkle-free brow, and yoga butt.
  3. Ignore the visions of perfection that dance in your head and fall in love with who you are right now.
I have to come to realize that just making yourself happy is most important. Never be ashamed of what you feel. You have the right to feel any emotion that you want, and to do what makes you happy. That’s my life motto. – Demi Lovato

So we’re talking about this idea like a make happier makeover and I have to tell you want to think I have a really hard time with is doing nice things for myself. I always feel guilty saying this right I was like all you’re running around like a crazy you should go like you know a day is fine. Oh my god my god no no that’s a whole day, divide all the stuff.

I have heard people say that if you want to feel better and become happier, just something nice for someone else and that’s great and I’ve seen the bumper sticker and I totally (Nataly: A lot of science behind it) but I think even more powerful to you, instead of doing something nice for someone else even someone you don’t know why not do something nice for yourself?

I think it’s very hard to swallow. But I think most women are busy probably taking care of the family the kids their husbands for the working full-time is the last thing you’re thinking is that I’m gonna go to a spa for a day and maybe but do I was pissed off last and you never took time to take care of you.

You just really continually sending a message to yourself saying you’re not worth it you don’t deserve it you’re less and less and you’re not gonna be as good of a mom and nothing is better than employer a boss.

It’s really important subconsciously that you send a message to yourself that you’re worth it. It’s like those L’Oréal commercials there so that really true. It may seem a little selfish at first take in hour out of your week or day to do something for you. It is really important so you can figure it taken care of either.

You know it’s like Saturdays I go to this hip hop yoga class. Which is my favourite hour but I feel really guilty because I also have a daughter and on weekends I like to be with her. And I actually said to her, Mia I can’t decide. Should I go and she said that go, you always come out of there so happy. Right, I think that is what you’re talking about. (Carson: It’s a worthwhile investment).

It seems so selfish. – Nataly Kogan

This is really easy. This is your like on-guilty do something for yourself pampering moment and maybe start out with ten minutes. Something quick and easy that’s just about you.

It could be a mani-pedi, it could be a neck-shoulder massage, do something a small amount of time, small amount of monitoring investment but really rewarding because you need to do something that says “that you’re worthy and your important and you need to be taken care of.” Easy!

I’ve decided to spend my time for myself with my creativity. Rewarding myself with all my hard work in my recovery, and using all my gained knowledge, experience and all else to put into something as creative as I can set my mind to.

Probably in December or November I started working on one of many important and worthy (like all of them) articles on how Instagram can harm your mental health and adding all my gained knowledge and experiences to back up my proof towards my main statement and belief. Still currently working on it and will post in time this weekend for sure.

This weekend is my deadline! It’s time, I’ve put it off for long enough, it’s time to get it created, complete and out there in the world to inspire, encourage, educate, and change millions of lives!

A negative mind will never give you a positive life.

Justin Bieber is a great example who has inspired great things and change overall:

I’m looking forward to influencing others in a positive way,” says Justin. “My message is you can do anything if you just put your mind to it. I grew up below the poverty line; I didn’t have as much as other people did. I think it made me stronger as a person it built my character. Now I have a 4.0 grade point average and I want to go to college and just become a better person.”

You always gotta keep a smile on your face. It’s all about positivity. At the end of the day, it comes down to a young man in a room writing a song. That’s where it all started. No matter how hard things get, everything will be alright. Believe in yourself. Believe you can do anything if you set your mind to it!

One small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.

Getting It Right & Self Worth

Life isn’t always fair and we will make many mistakes throughout our lives, but what’s important is to know that we will get it right:

Just have faith and hold tight.

Life has a lot of sections, groups, rules, restrictions, dos and don’ts and many others too. And a lot of us feel and give in to that pressure of what is “perfect” in our society as this new generation continues and many others. We feel as if it’s too much for us to handle & think that the easiest thing to do is give in rather than stay strong.

But if you find a way to stay strong through these tough times, it will show life and all the people that care and love you, how strong you truly are & that nothing can bring you down. Plus seeing that you won’t let anything hold you back. To see you truly have enough strength to fully become and embrace the person that you truly want to be and achieve what you truly want with your life.

Just imagine that right now! Wouldn’t that be amazing! A great impact on you and your life! That kind of power can be more amazing when you get there than you’ve ever known or thought it would be.

“Now I feel the weight of the world is on my shoulders” – Rachel Berry, Glee


If you want to learn more on how to gain these things in your life and in yourself resulting in all that you ever dreamed of living in all reality? Then continue reading and you’ll start changing while your reading. Trust me, it works. Words from an article that help us “better ourselves” can start changing you as you read.

While you read, you learn and start to understand what they are talking about, and also think about times that they talked about, remind you and see where you thought wrong (difference between what you knew & what you learn after). Well let’s get started!

Numerous Attempts & Yet Still No Success

At times in life, we watch movies, documentaries, tv shows, and music that is inspiring, encouraging, uplifting, and very helpful with areas in yourself that you see needs improving or a new mindset as an example. We feel that power that they all have in the ways they perceive, explain, sing, act and create, but sometimes it doesn’t always work out as smoothly as we originally thought it would.

We’ve tried many other methods, solutions by looking online to see what other people use yet not everyone gets success from different solutions/methods in this particular area. But we need to remember that a group of twenty trying a new diet method; may work for ten people but the other ten doesn’t. Not one diet method works (is suited) for everyone out there). Don’t be hard on yourself, many others are in the same boat as you. Your not alone in this.

We just need to see what we’ve done wrong or what didn’t work, and the things that helped us lose even 2 – 5lbs or however how many inches. Do some brainstorming, more research, see what your body can tolerate, and what it can’t. See how many calories you need to consume per day. This is a great example when talking about having little to no faith and/or no success in getting things right in your life. Life isn’t easy, everyone just learns how to cope with the highs and lows of all life in reality.

Now, let’s get started in talking about what we can start doing to help us not be hard on ourselves when we continue to not get things right in our lives till we do get it right. And start using the right things like hope, strength, control and other things like that to help us take better care of ourselves to get better results: the results we’ve been searching for months, or even years.

Starting Fresh

Let’s start by thinking of what we’ve done wrong in our lives. Then see how you handled them. After that, think about how you would want to handle it differently if you could. Then, think of what you know from what you learned from making those mistakes, not getting it right. When and where are you gonna use what you learned in your next attempt at getting it right. Knowing self care tips in these types of situations will be important before working on your (“getting it right, this time”).

Feeling Good Enough: Self Care

When we don’t get something right or we mess up, we feel like we aren’t good enough nor is the work that we messed up isn’t good enough, even when we try. Knowing the right mental tips when put in these situations are essential to improving your mental health. Which is really helpful in these situations.

So first, we have to silence that voice in our minds that convinces us of how our self worth is perceived for ourselves and our work by others. To do that, you have to know that you are worthy of many things and you should focus on doing better rather than giving in to that voice proving you wrong. Next, is being easy on yourself: don’t let what others criticize you at work and anywhere else ruin the person that you are nor your life in any way. You are in control of most of your life.

So take control of the things that you can and see change in yourself and in your life in time. Be patient, time is the best medicine for many things in life: recovery, painful events, family, friend loss, and others. So use this to help you conquer and achieve the things that you want and be who you want to be without hiding from others just from your own past experiences… You are much more than you think you are!

“Can I start again, with my faith shaken? Cause I can’t go back and undo this. I just have to stay and face my mistakes. But if I get stronger and wiser. I’ll get through this. What can you do when your good isn’t good enough? And all that you touch tumbles down? Cause my best intentions keep making a mess of things. I just wanna fix it somehow. But how many times will it take? Oh, how many times will it take for me to get it right? So I throw up my fist, throw a punch in the air. And accept the truth that sometimes life isn’t fair! Yeah, I’ll send out a wish, yeah. I’ll send up a prayer. And finally someone will see how much I care.”

Recreating Our Outlook On Success & Accomplishment

Lastly, now that you know how to be patient and take better care of your mental health when you don’t get something right a few times. You will start to perceive a new outlook on success and accomplishment, knowing the right things on getting it right!

This new book on WattPad I’ve created is here to inspire anyone who is needing of inspirational and encouraging logic towards the belief or theory or logical reasoning for not being ashamed of reading self help books or end asking for help.

Having a guide or those kinds of people who you can honestly feel so comfortable talking about anything with whether it’s personal secrets, daliy life struggles, or even anything around mental health issues or struggles that we all go through and experience more than once on more than one issue or topic in our own individual lives!

So please refer, reference and reccomend this new book of mine here on WattPad to anyone you know that would benefit greatly from this book. Regardless of their own personal struggles, problems, etc they are facing, struggling or living with.

And inspire, educate, encourage, and all else that involves with those who are new to recovery and overall educational resources in recovering from any mental illness of any kind and need the educational knowledge, support from you, others and helpful resources like this and many others too.

In fact, consider the idea of making a pact or goal or achievement or something to commit both you and anyone who is struggling with anything that has some kind of shame, stigma or discrimination, and work on improving yourselves as individuals together.

Agree on some ground rules, pacts like finding healthy, positive and helpful ways to cope with daily life struggles including stress, anxiety, other important milestones like boyfriends, new jobs, further education, busy schedules, support, and others that can interfere and break up friends and partners during times along the journey!

When it comes to inspiration in our reality with our current generation, it can be hard with all society’s expectations, standards and such that keep us away too easily from the person that we would be confident being.

It’s too too true to believe that we all have given into that power of society, which not far into that process where we begin to lose ourselves. When we lose our sight of our real self, our beliefs, values, personality, friends, family, passion, purpose, hobbies and so much more.

It’s sad or hard to imagine how powerful this kind of thing can impact our world for all of society. How come we let it get this far? How did we let our own society (include yourself, your part of society too, even if you didn’t cause or take part in any of our issues, causes, epidemics in our world) become so bad leading to creating so many issues and shame in our world.

But with all our individual knowledge, experience, education; we can without a doubt do all we can to figure out the main cause or trigger of each one and find all the possible solutions and choosing the right one for each cause to help break down barriers, stigmas, shame, chaos, hate and more. Imagine what our world would look like then?

Let’s use that as our motivation and why we choose to hold on regardless of what life throws at us making us feel hopeless or even helpless at times. Regardless of how hopeless and helpless we may feel from reality, we have to stay strong and stick to our reason for holding on, for working hard without giving up on something; everything that needs to be fixed.

And that reason being how badly we want that end result of doing so, that feeling, the look, the outcomes overall of this kind of impact we can have on our world.

Now, most times, it all starts with one person and then becomes a chain reaction. Other times, it begins by working/improving/recreating ourselves after self destruction from any illness (physical, emotional or mental illness).

The Key To Freedom

We all wanna be free. And yet we all have our own definitions of freedom. Though we seem to be held back by both society and the government for what they set out for rules and laws to follow to be responsible citizens of society. But reality shouldn’t work that way. At some point in history, they granted us the freedom of speech. Freedom of expression.

Yet they seem to not mean that for many years now even in the 21st century. You granted us freedom of speech, freedom of expression yet you seem to limit us of what we can and cannot express openly. Giving us freedom of expression, freedom of speech means no limitations, no hold backs at all in any way.

So I’ve decided to create this book to help inspire all those who feel limited, scared and ashamed in many areas of life that prevent us from being who we want to be, resulting in being comfortable, confident, content with that person and achieving our life dreams, purposes, passions, hobbies, works of art and so much more. But seem to be limited and held back a whole lot from both society and the government.

This is our time, our year to change things. Let’s make the world a better place by making the things the way they should be, no war, no hate, no crimes, no lack of anything or anything negative minus the negative things we cannot control.

So as far as you’ve come reading wise with this helpful and useful article and form of therapy and educational resources, I’m proud of you for reading this far overall choosing to read this whole post. Thank you. Be proud of yourself. That took courage, strength and guts.

Everything I have, everything I own, All my mistakes, fan, you already know. I wanna be free, (free) I wanna be free. (free). From Senegal West Africa. To St. Louis, Missouri, Thanks to Katherine Dunham. For giving my pops his glory. He came down with his drum. And a dream to change the world in a free uplifting world. And that’s all he ever want. Mom came a little after, gave birth to my brother. Then all of the pressure made ‘em fight one another.

See, the pain would never last, did the best with what they had, he knew the world was out for grabs. And he searched to find his: Freedom, Freedom, Freedom, (oh) Freedom. Everything I have, (have) everything I own. All my mistakes, fan, you already know. I wanna be free, (free) I wanna be free. So, I search to find my (find my)

Freedom, Freedom, (oh yea) Freedom, (oh) Freedom. Everything I have, (have) everything I own. All my mistakes, girl, you already know. I wanna be free, (free) I wanna be free, (free) yeah.

As a kid I never knew I’d have to hustle just to make it through. So, I found myself skipping school, ‘cause the girls don’t think I’m cool. And because of that I didn’t care. Whether or not I went to jail, I just wanna be treated fair, ‘cause that’s all I ever knew.

Tellin’ me I need to slow down, (slow down) ‘cause everybody in the whole town, (whole town) ‘Cause they know how I get down, (get down) Foreigner from another town. (whole town) Can you believe we still around? (slow down) After so many hit the ground. (the ground)

And we ain’t gonna stop now, (stop now) until we get that freedom, (oh) Freedom, (oh) Freedom, (oh) Freedom, everything I have, (have) everything I own, (own) All my mistakes, fan, you already know, (yea) I wanna be free, (free) I wanna be free,

(Won’t stop till I find my) Freedom, (my Freedom) Freedom, (my Freedom) Freedom, (oh) Freedom Everything I have, (have) everything I own, (own) All my mistakes, girl, you already know, (yeah) I wanna be free, (free) I wanna be free. (free)

If you wanna be free, and the land is drug-free, put your hands up, (hey) put your hands up. (hey) If you wanna be free, from all your misery, put your hands up, (hey) put your hands up. (hey) If you wanna be free, with plenty money, put your hands up, (hey) put your hands up. (hey) If you wanna be free, just praise G-O-D, put your hands up, (hey) put your hands up. (hey)

Freedom, (oh) Freedom (Freedom), Freedom, (oh) Freedom

Everything I have, everything I own, All my mistakes, girl, you already know, I wanna be free (wanna be free), I wanna be free (wanna be free yea yea yea yea)