No one sets out to be the villain in someone else’s story. I’d like to believe that, although just a cursory glance at the daily news would suggest that might not be true. It seems more likely that many don’t care. There is villainy of gargantuan proportions on display with monotonous regularity.
Well there maybe isn’t anything that can be done about the rest of the world, but for me the idea that I may have caused harm (not physical harm because there was zero chance of that, I couldn’t or wouldn’t even swat a fly) but might have thrown another’s psyche into disarray… however briefly and unintentionally; makes me vaguely sick.
But I have done it. I think. Only a temporary blip but still…I knew it because this person accused me of terrible crimes. Although they had lashed out in hurt, the words they chose to use then were to end the potential friendship immediately. I had wanted to ask for a hiatus anyway for sound reasons, which they probably would have understood… if they had only given me time to talk. Oh well. What can you do? I am sure I did the best I could at the time. I’m sure they did the best that they could at the time.
And it brings up for me the idea of reframing. What happened was not pleasant, entirely avoidable and the outcome could have been very different.
But should it have been?
