Or where are all my peeps at?
Making friends as an adult sucks. Especially in the context of the church.
Hi. My name is T. I am married. My wife and I have 3 kids. We go to church and we -don;- don’t have any friends. (I should probably clarify here because I didn’t when typing- we mean close, friends we would consider to be family.) What gives? Doesn’t going to church automatically grant you awesome, life-long friendships:/-? (trust me, it was a way messier end on the typewriter…) ? Oh. It doesn’t, does it.
Making friends as an adult sucks. Especially in the context of the church. Why is that? We’ve been back in a town we previously lived in for about8 8 months now (we were previously here for about 8 years-(-). Sheesh. -I¢m- I’m rusty at typing on this mechanical wonder. Definitely giving name to messy typewriter today. Anyway, getting back on track here.
We8ve — We’ve been back for 8 months. Not a single person we knew before has reached out and said, “It’s great you’re back. Want to hang out?” Not that we really expected it to happen given how we left. (some interjection here — it would have been really great though!) But that’s a completely different post (all by itself). Type. Blog. Thing. We’ve been going to the same church (a different one than when we were here last time, though I should add that here) since we’ve been back too. We rarely, if ever, see -that- the same people week-to-week. Issues of the “mega church” (if you can call 2,000 a mega church, though I guess it is given it’s size compared to other churches in town).
Don’t get me wrong here. We aren’t expecting friendship to fall in our lap. We’ve gone to the “getting to know the church class” and we’ve tried three different small groups.
I also don’t expect an instant connection, but there has to be some sort of common ground that causes us to say, “that wasn’t bad. I think I’ll try these people again.” Still haven’t had that moment.
Don’t get me wrong here. We aren’t expecting friendship to fall in our lap.
So. I ask, “what is it about being an adult that makes it so difficult to make, find, create new friendships? Inside the context of the church or outside? It really doesn’t matter at this point.
Did we all get burned too many times as a kid? Do those who have maintained close friends from their younger years just not have room for new friends? Are we afraid people are going to like what they find when they get to know us in a deeper context? Blah. Context just seems to be the word of this
June 10, 2016 continued
really, it’s being continued on June 12 and a second page
post and now that I’ve seen it, it’s going to bug me. We now return you to your regularly schedule program…
Hi. My name is T. My wife and I have 3 kids. We live in northern Colorado. We love nerdy things — video games, board games, watching movies (adding this; and TV) geocaching, and playing Ingress. We read books. I like cars. She likes nail polish.
Will you be our -firend?- friend?
Too desperate? I really don’t know what else to try. I don’t think we are scary people. And I know you are out there. People like us who can’t find friends either — but are genuinely looking for someone else to go through this messy life with.
I ask again. “Where are you people hiding? Let’s hang out, drink some beers, and play Settlers of Catan while our kids run amok. -What’dya8-
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