How Do I Live Now Without the Life of the Mind?

Transitioning to a post-academic life

Ivery del Campo
Metafictions

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Photo by Sharon Pittaway on Unsplash

With Z-Library taken down (though I think it’ll spring back up elsewhere or in some other form — because the need for it persists, and taking it down does nothing to address the need), I rummaged in my drives to collect in one folder all the mostly scholarly books I’ve downloaded over the years, from Z-Lib and from others. To secure them like prized possessions.

While going through my mess of academic spoils, I also found a list of books “to look for” jotted down in a notebook in 2020. The list was from when I still taught and, when not writing modules to serve the rush for online courses, I filled my A4 size research notebook with bibliographic notes. When reading, I don’t consider a book “read” unless I’ve taken down notes from it, whether or not they’ll end up in a paper or in a course (they usually don’t).

Reading and taking down notes is more of a personal, not professional, necessity for me. It’s been my way of getting a hold of myself because there are two ways by which I get lost:

  1. when I’m suffocating in a blob of unprocessed ideas both created and received;
  2. when I’m not receiving any stimulation from a good book, work of art, a film, anything.

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