Fixing Emma
With a bit of help from Photoshop
Emma, my wife, sent me her Facebook profile picture and asked me to remove the ugly mole on her nose.
I launched Photoshop. It was an old version I bought in a yard sale a few days earlier for fifteen bucks. The opening screen said, “This is an experimental version. Not for public use.” I hesitated, but then clicked OK. Who cares as long as it can remove a small dark spot? I proceeded and carefully removed the mole from the picture.
The next morning, I heard a scream from the bathroom. Emma came out running and I was shocked to see the real mole on her nose vanished!
Emma was ecstatic. She sent a few more pictures and ordered me to fix other blemishes. A wrinkle on her cheek. A scar on her upper arm. Slightly curved ear. I protested but then gave in.
Last night, I was fixing few strands of her gray hair. It was late, and I was tired. I must’ve messed up the layers in the Photoshop file because I heard a scream.
I ran to the bedroom and switched on the lights.
Emma was sitting in the middle of the bed.
Without her head.
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