We Can’t Hug From Arm’s Length
One definition Webster offer for arm’s length is “a distance discouraging personal contact or familiarity”. I’ve been thinking about arm’s length for awhile, as it came up last year during a conversation with my denomination’s provincial moderator.
This conversation came about after I’d written an open letter to my church leaders, asking them to join four other church organizations who had made statements of support in searching the Prairie Green landfill for the sacred remains of three Indigenous Women known to be resting there.
The moderator saw little value in issuing a statement containing nice but empty words devoid of action, a sentiment I agree with, and asked an excellent question.
“What does it look like for our churches to be engaged in the MMIWG2S+ issue?”
That’s a huge question, and because it’s one I’m ill equipped to answer on my own I stuck to the MMIWG2S+ calls to action which apply to all Canadians. A lot of Indigenous led emotional labor has gone into this report so, being non-Indigenous, there’s no way I’d disregard it by centering my own ideas.
The items all Canadians are accountable to is a short list of eight items. Eight items which, if taken seriously, would make a huge difference at a societal level.
1) Speak out against violence.
2) Decolonize by learning.
3) Learn from the final report.
4) Using what you’ve learned, become a strong ally.
5) End white silence.
6) Acknowledge the value of every person & community, recongnizing the rights of Indigenous Peoples to self-determined solutions.
7) Move more and more into relationships with Indigenous Peoples.
8) Hold governments responsible to the sections of this document which apply to them.
To their question about what it could look like, I walked them through a few practical ways we could do this together as a denomination, as congregations, and as individuals.
They found this was a little ambitions, but did agree to a baby step. A collaborative event hosted by four congregations who were well positioned to walk into this.
I liked the use of the word engagement in their question, and I brought these ideas on engagement to that meeting.
1) Being engaged is not comfortable.
2) Being engaged is the opposite of being disengaged.
3) When our support is only through giving, we’re actually feeding disengagement by keeping ourselves at arms length.
4) What all Christians are called to can not be subcontracted.
I received some push-back on those last two points, in the form of another good question which I couldn’t adequately address in the moment.
What about Mrs. Friesen from Altona?
They went on to describe a hypothetical Mrs. Friesen. Someone in their twilight years who’s quite representative of our denomination. Mrs. Friesen’s willing to bake some pies, drive into the city to drop them off at One88, our denomination’s inner city drop-in center. Mrs. Friesen is comfortable dropping off the pies but, given the clientele One88 serves, she’s not going to hang out there.
Let me make this clear. There is more to Indigenous Peoples then trauma. That means Mrs. Friesen does not have to travel to Winnipeg and visit an inner city drop-in to pursue relationships with Indigenous Peoples.
Imagine Mrs. Friesen spending some afternoons with a handful of aunties and kookums [from the Cree, grandmothers] cuddling babies in a nursery and what that could lead to. Perhaps a month or two down the road her new friends would be sharing their teachings so they could make star blankets together. Imagine them gathering at Mrs. Friesen’s home to bake pies together for that inner city drop in, because they're making a road trip to the city to take in the full moon ceremony at the Forks. That would be engaged. That would be living out the seventh call to action, “Moving more and more into relationships with Indigenous Peoples”. All Canadians are called to this, and the fact that my denomination are not setting an example in this area is tragic.
I wish I’d have said that during the meeting but I’m not quick enough on my feet. I did ask for a follow-up conversation which they agreed to. This had me looking forward to discussing that multi-church event and excited about the opportunity to respond to the Mrs. Friesen question in a better way. Unfortunately, my email asking to schedule this meeting wasn’t responded to. Neither was my follow up.
That seventh call to action, moving more and more into relationships with Indigenous Peoples, is key to being engaged. In fact I can not imagine living this out and remaining disengaged. I love that it reads “more and more” rather than just “more”. More and more demands that we circle back for more, again and again and again. If Mrs. Friesen’s dropping off a pie doesn’t lead to her circling back for more she’s missing the point here.
I stand by what I said. When our support is only through giving we’re feeding disengagement. Please don’t skip over that word, only. Linger there for a bit as it’s the key one.
What? Are you saying that your heart isn’t where your treasure is? Not quite. What I’m saying is that a “not necessarily” should be in the backs of the heads of those who are reading that Mathew 6:21 passage though a privileged lens.
I can’t imagine my Indigenous friends making a donation to something they aren’t fully engaged in, let alone using that verse to justify their disengagement. Their sacred life energy is directed outwards into their communities and their generosity flows from that, and that generous outward focus is consistent, regardless of where they’re found on spectrum of economic oppression. There’s no compartmentalization between work, family and spirituality in those circles and that same integrity is found in how Indigenous Peoples give. Giving your life energy to something always involves more than just writing a cheque.
A few months ago this disconnect between giving and engagment lived itself out in an illuminating way. My church’s Easter compassion project for this year involved One88, that inner city drop-in the moderator referred to in that question about Mrs. Friesen.
As Easter approached I saw a post on One88's Instagram about someone from their community whose gone missing, asking anyone with information to connect with the police and/or Bear Clan. I shared this from my Instagram asking others to spread the word, and invited my church to post from their account as a collaborator.
My church passed on that opportunity to come alongside One88, joining me in their efforts to find their community member, but we did write One88 a nice sized cheque six days later on Easter Sunday. Was our heart there also? Was it with One88 along with our treasure? Not in this case. Not by a long shot.
I’m not a theologian so I’ll leave it to others to dissect and improve upon my thoughts on Mathew 6:21. I’m just bearing witness to what I’ve observed. Bearing witness to a church culture of convenience which allows us to subcontract out things our faith calls us to. Subcontracting out things that need to be embodied by writing a cheque instead of doing the work.
Thankfully there is some research being done around this. Two days ago I learned that someone from the NAIITS Indigenous Learning Community is doing PhD work, studying the apathy towards missing and murdered Indigenous Peoples (MMIP) which permeates the culture of so many church communities.
I’m looking forward to reading their work, and hope that it doesn’t end up collecting dust in my denomination’s library in the same way that final report into MMIWG2S+ is still gathering dust in the libraries of those in positions of political power.
I’d be more than happy to talk one-on-one with anyone whose found this interesting. Thanks for reading.
