How to WIN Valentines Day
Valentine’s Day is known as a day to celebrate your love for your significant other, and as a day that can bring angst to men around the world. If you are single and celebrate the 14th of February as singles awareness day, you may want to skip this blog.
I am going to demystify how to “rule” Valentine’s day, but first let’s take a look at the history of the “Holiday.”
Who Came up with Valentine’s Day
We men actually have the Romans to thank for this day of angst. According to History.com, the celebration of Valentines day was originally observed as Lupercalia on February 15th by the Romans and later moved to the 14th by the Catholic church in an effort to “Christianize” the holiday.
The ancient Roman men would sacrifice a goat and dog at the save where they believed the gods Romulus and Remus to have been raised by a she wolf. They would then take the goat hides and gently use them to slap women in order to promote fertility while running through the streets. Before you get any ideas, this is not a good plan for modern day lovers.
At the end of the day, all of the young women would place their names in a big urn and the cities bachelors would select names at random in a sort of ancient “key party.” The party lasted more than a day, however, as the pairings were made for at least a year and often ended in Marriage.
So, was there a Saint Valentine?
Definitely, maybe. According to History.com :
The Catholic Church recognizes at least three different saints named Valentine or Valentinus, all of whom were martyred. One legend contends that Valentine was a priest who served during the third century in Rome. When Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than those with wives and families, he outlawed marriage for young men. Valentine, realizing the injustice of the decree, defied Claudius and continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. When Valentine’s actions were discovered, Claudius ordered that he be put to death.
Other stories suggest that Valentine may have been killed for attempting to help Christians escape harsh Roman prisons, where they were often beaten and tortured. According to one legend, an imprisoned Valentine actually sent the first “valentine” greeting himself after he fell in love with a young girl–possibly his jailor’s daughter–who visited him during his confinement. Before his death, it is alleged that he wrote her a letter signed “From your Valentine,” an expression that is still in use today. Although the truth behind the Valentine legends is murky, the stories all emphasize his appeal as a sympathetic, heroic and–most importantly–romantic figure. By the Middle Ages, perhaps thanks to this reputation, Valentine would become one of the most popular saints in England and France
OK, when did all the romantic stuff start?
The oldest known romantic Valentines day greeting was written in 1415 by Charles, Duke of Orleans, to his wife while he was in jail in the Tower of London. By the 1800’s it was customary for people to give small tokens of affection on the 14th, and by the 1900’s cheap postage and ready made cards caused the day to explode in popularity and now over 1 Billion Valentine’s Day greetings are sent each year.
GREAT, now how do I make the day special?
This can be tricky, especially for Millennial men. However, there are a few things that can be done to make sure you “win” V-Day even if you are “ballin on a budget.”
First, remember that this holiday exists and plan ahead. If you wake up on the 14th and remember its V-Day because of Facebook, you have already lost. It takes good planning to execute V-Day properly.
Second, do your recon. You may be thinking, “I should just ask her what she wants for Valentines Day.” It’s a trap! This one 3 out of 365 days per year you cannot say “what do you want to do.” You need to do this one on your own.
· Recon Tip 1: Try and remember all of the hints she has dropped about what SHE would like to have/do. They probably weren’t subtle, you are just dense.
· Recon Tip 2: Create a fake Pinterest account and stalk her boards. I found out that my wife likes X by doing this recon.
· Recon Tip 3: Disguise your voice and call her friends to ask them hypothetical questions what THEY would like for Valentines day. This is effective because when your lady posts what you did, her FRIENDS will all swoon and instantly elevate your status among the pack.
Third, execute with extreme precision. You don’t get any do overs on V-Day. Make sure you plan your work and work your plan. The devil is in the details. Make sure you cover the basics:
· Is it V-Day?
· Food
· Wine
· Flowers
· Candy
· Food allergies
Lastly, avoid the temptation to cook unless you are good at it. Nothing ruins V-Day like vomit.
If you are still having issues being creative, here is a list of V-Day activities that you can’t go wrong with.
· Starlight Picnic: Bring a Blanket, picnic, wine and music. Extra Points if you have a telescope
· Home Made Drive In: Set a TV on the hood of your car (put a blanket down first you savage) and eat pop corn and snacks while you watch her favorite movie. Extra points if you use an LCD projector
· Booze Boquet: If you and your lady enjoy a good drink, get an assortment of mini-liquers and tape them to skewers.
· Igloo Picnic: Basically the same idea as the startlight picnic, but for people who live where is its cold as hell and snowy. Build an igloo or ice fort and have a candlelit diner inside. You’ll have fun making the igloo, and she will be dazzled by both your construction skills and ingenuity.
Comment below with any additional ideas to help us Men get creative on V-Day
Originally posted on my blog at www.therealnickmorrow.com
