Just Go With the Flow
The plan failed and it’s ok!
Pushing yourself to get everything done when you are already anxious can be a nightmare. Although it’s important to stay motivated and organized, and carry on as we normally would, sometimes we just need to accept that there will be times when all we can do is go with the flow. Trying to over-plan and prepare won’t always work out, and that’s ok. Setting goals and being prepared is one way to prevent anxiety, but there is a little thing called doing too much.
I went on vacation back in May; it was my first vacation since the pandemic and it was supposed to be a wonderful adventure to my favorite place, the happiest place on earth to be exact! When the trip was booked I was so excited that I would be able to travel again. I thought, “I’m fully vaccinated and healthy, how can anyone feel anxious at Disney?!” Well, it turns out that was the only question I asked myself throughout the entire trip, “Why am I so anxious?” Before vacation I did what in my opinion was all the right things — I planned out an itinerary of everything I wanted to eat, see, and do, I watched Disney videos in preparation for the trip, I constantly ran vacation-related errands, and I obsessed all day every day until it was finally time to go. I thought I was completely prepared and that there was nothing wrong with going above and beyond. Needless to say, I was in for a rude awakening when I finally made it to vacation. I was super anxious, my head was spinning, wearing a mask in the Florida heat was killing me, I was overthinking everything, and if something on my list of to-dos didn’t work out forget it, I freaked out.
The thing that I failed to recognize is that sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself is to go with the flow; when you’re someone who is a planner, however, that can be really hard to do. I was under the impression that if I did things the way that I normally would and put my anxious feelings on the back burner, and try not to think about them, then any anxiety would magically go away and everything would be back to normal. Well, I’m sure you’re not surprised when I say this, but I was very wrong. Sadly my trip to the happiest place on earth was anything but, and I came home feeling defeated and disappointed that my anxiety won this round. It was ok though, this was my first time vacationing in a while, and I never felt anxious on vacation, so when I got home I analyzed what went wrong. The answer was simple, I tried to do too much at once and I didn’t take into account that things have changed and I too need to change with them.
Two weeks ago I got the opportunity to redeem myself, I took a road trip with my friends to Tennessee. This time I did things differently; I focused more on my overall wellbeing before vacation, which included working out, eating healthy, and meditating, and I didn’t over-prepare for this trip. I mean I’m still a planner so naturally, I had things that I wanted to see and do, but this time I didn’t allow the thoughts of planning for this vacation to consume me. I went with the flow each day, I didn’t overanalyze when things went wrong, and thankfully I stayed calm for most of the trip. I still had anxious moments here and there, and times where I needed to take a step back, but the takeaway is that because I allowed myself to go with the flow, the experience was much better for me in comparison to my last one.
Imagine how much worse it would have been had I not decided to take a breather this time and accept the fact that it would be ok if everything didn’t go exactly as I planned?! It’s important to recognize that the more pressure that we put on ourselves, and the more expectations we have, the more anxious we will become and our minds will start going into overdrive. Planning is a normal activity in our lives, but we need to keep in mind that it goes beyond deciding what we need and want to do. Planning for our wellbeing is just as important if not the most important thing we can do for ourselves. We simply cannot plan or even carry out those plans, or function really if we aren’t first right with ourselves. Believe that it’s ok to put your needs first! Take a deep breath, make sure that you are well, trust that everything will work out in the end, and accept the idea that it’s ok to let go; it’s not realistic to be in control 100% of the time and that’s ok.
If you liked this story, I’d love for you to check out some of my other ones!
