9 Conversation Skills That Everybody Should Know

Techniques that can lead you to more meaningful discussions and deeper connections.

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

I admit it: I’ve been a horrible conversationalist.

I’ve hogged discussions. I’ve given one-sided monologues. I’ve gone on and on (and on) about myself. I vented and complained. I told story after story. I redirected a two-way conversation back to the person I thought was more important: me.

I admit it: my low E.Q. made me do it. I lacked self-awareness. I scored abysmally in patience. I granted neither grace nor gratitude. I was self-absorbed. When I spoke, I wanted to get to my point, my anecdote, my shiny and clever contribution. I didn’t fully understand the dance of dialogue.

Turns out, true conversation is more duet than solo.

There were other factors that made me a poor conversation partner. Stress. A hectic teaching schedule. The non-stop parenting of young children. An absent and workaholic spouse. A lack of self-care. All these ignited a desperate desire for adult conversation.

But when I found myself across the coffee table from a consenting and conversational friend, these stressors and bad habits led me away from a real and authentic exchange of words…