Can We Actually Make Our Dreams Come True?

Most people don’t achieve their dreams in their lifetime. Why is this the case?

Photo by Andrey Larin on Unsplash

Most of the time dreams are left alone. However, sometimes with a surge of inspiration, people impulsively move straight to action, working harder than ever, making huge sacrifices, and stretching like never before. With time, as reality strikes, this unsustainable energy gives way and plans are shelved.

In being spontaneous, we overestimate willpower, motivational energy, and the romantic notion of making multiple sacrifices to fulfil our dreams. This mindset ignores the strategizing and planning phases, making a difficult path even more inaccessible.

Really, we need to shift our mindset towards viewing our dreams as projects and then “project managing” them in a robust manner.

A good framework that can facilitate this involves finding a strong source of inspiration that is sustainable; understanding the reality of the path; and creating an achievable plan. All 3 need to be done conscientiously in order to give a shot at fulfiling dreams.

1. Inspirational Vision

The aim of this phase is to create a vision powerful enough to generate motivation that is sustained through the setbacks that will be encountered along the journey. While it’s good to start with the surface level end-goal, this by itself is rarely enough.

The goal needs to be translated into an inspirational vision that is both authentic and has a meaningful impact.

Authenticity

Shifting from an external perspective to an internal one manifests true motivation. An authentic vision is created by clarifying intentions and connecting them with personal values. This vision being uniquely us has the power to align with every fibre of our being and unleashing boundless energy, enabling us to do things we never imagined.

Here are a few questions that can help dig deeper:

1. Why is this important?
2. Who will I be?
3. What values will be honoured?

Impact

After the inward inquiry, it’s important to move upwards to a 30,000-foot view. The big picture helps us to understand the impact of our dreams on us, our colleagues, friends, family and society at large. This realization dissolves the ego and releases collective energy that is expansive and infinite.

Motivation from a place of abundance feels limitless versus the constrained energy of selfish pursuits.

Here are a few questions to clarify the impact:

1. What would success look and feel like?
2. Who will this impact?
3. What difference will this make?

Reflection on these questions over a few weeks can help shape an inspirational vision that resonates deeply.

2. Reality Check

To get a real sense of the path ahead, the rose-coloured glasses need to be removed. Given that most of the time will be spent on the journey and not the destination, it’s imperative that we fully understand what this entails.

Skills

An honest assessment of the skills required versus status-quo is needed. It’s ideal to aim for goals slightly above current skill levels to enable learning and growth.

Here are a few helpful questions:

1. What are my relevant strengths?
2. What skills are needed to succeed?
3. How will I get the support I need?

Everyday Life

Going with eyes-wide-open gives us a clear sense of what everyday life will look like. To become a writer, it’s not good enough to have strong ideas or even write well — one needs to be prepared to write 5,000 words a day. This could be our reality for the next 2–4 years. Are we ready for this?

Here are a few questions to consider:

1. What would everyday life look like?
2. What will I need to drop from life?
3. How do I have fun?

Juxtapositioning dreams versus reality will provide a clear gauge of what it takes to be successful. It’s good to meditate on this for a while before moving to action.

3. Practical Plan

After strategic thinking, it’s time for planning. An effective plan is one that’s smartly tailored around one’s unique work-style. This involves creating digestible targets and formulating a work-system that weaves around the current life routine.

Goals & Accountability

A huge mountain of a task overwhelms and results in procrastination. By breaking it up into smaller milestones, an achievable path can be created. The mini-goals should be well-defined and provide a clear view of the path ahead; achievable in order to instil confidence and measurable to foster forward movement. It’s critical to build in accountability into the plans — ideally to someone else or a system as it’s easy to trick oneself.

Here are a few questions to consider:

1. What mini goals will lead me to my dream?
2. How will I be accountable?
3. What challenges will I face?

Structure

Structure is the activity system that binds the plan together. In line with individual style, this can be defined as a tight routine or a loose approach that does not constrain creativity. With strong self-awareness, we can design a structure that seamlessly fits into our lifestyle.

Here are a few questions to consider:

1. What setting have I performed best in?
2. How will this fit in my life?
3. What tools should I use?

Plans are a work-in-progress, that need to be constantly reviewed and tinkered till they feel right.

The 3 phases may seem linear, however, one can go back and forth across them. This process helps unpack our dreams and shape them in line with our growing self-awareness. In following the diligence of structured self-reflection, we must be open to whatever comes up.

Whether we fulfil our dreams, in the way we initially envisioned them, is not in our control. However, we can control the smartness with which we approach, the rigor with which we plan, and the passion with which we execute.

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