Life as a Lover: How to Live in Co-Creation with the Universe
On Releasing Control and Trusting Life a bit more
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In a lecture with a marketing manager from Spotify many years ago, the topic was how one’s usage of Spotify was seen as the start of a relationship. Just as you wouldn’t ask someone to marry you on the first date, they wouldn’t then ask a new user to become a monthly paid user upon downloading the app.
First, you go on a few dates together, and slowly things become more serious. Eventually, you get to talk about moving in together, and, later on, kids.
Relationships are two-way streets (at least healthy relationships). It doesn’t matter what one wants if it goes against what the other one wants. Or, as a teenage ex-boyfriend of mine used to tell me -a.k.a. my very first lesson about consent, “what one person does not want, two people don’t get to do.”
Kinda obvious, and yet a hard lesson in practice. Otherwise, why would we so often experience episodes of frustration, anger, and anxiety in life?
We forget that the universe is a living organism, just like us. Except, much bigger, and we are a part of it. We forget to listen. We don’t pay attention.
Don’t get me wrong we are all powerful — but we are not the emperor/empress of the world.
Things often do not go our way, and when our emotional intelligence is not very high, our relationship with life suffers. Which means, we suffer.
“When life pushes you to the edge, you have two options: fear the fall, or enjoy the view.” Connor Chalfant
In these moments, we either encounter so-called negative reactions, or we simply give up, and with indifference accept all as it is. We “get it” and, in disappointment, leave it at that.
And just like that, we carry a dysfunctional relationship with life. In our struggles and frustrations, and in our indifference, we go on living, in a loveless relationship with ourselves. Life becomes a schedule, things to do and appointments, with some entertainment and leisure moments here and there to compensate for the rest.