When Negative Feedback Punches You in the Gut, Don’t Punch Back
There are positive ways to move forward.
Feedback comes at you from all sides — managers, editors, parents, partners, children, colleagues, clients, and, thanks to social media, total strangers.
It can spur you to improve and achieve more, or it can derail you and send you into a downward, negative spiral.
Whether it helps or hinders, it usually hurts.
Research from Psychtests.com reveals that negative criticism can feel like “…a punch in the stomach…followed by a well of emotions — sadness, anger, shame, resentment, and maybe a little guilt….It ends with one of the following scenarios: an angry outburst, a tirade of past achievements, a deer-in-the-headlights look, a resolve to come out better, smarter, stronger, or a desire to take sweet, subtle revenge.”¹
Let’s do a quick activity:
- Remember a time when someone lavished praise on you and your work.
- Remember a time when someone tore apart your work and ground it into the ground with apparent glee.
If you’re like many people, it was easier to remember № 2. In fact, not only did you remember it in great detail, you probably re-experienced the same feelings.
