Why You Should Never Settle For Less Than You Deserve

The only thing that should settle is dust. And that’s only because it’s harder to vacuum it up in the air.

Emily Wilcox
Feb 20 · 4 min read

If this was 2042, then Medium would have recently installed a 5D widget (five-dimensional as in you can actually taste it) in which the underlying intent of any post on here is bellowed at you by a holographic character of your choice, appearing within three metres of your screen (I’ve already chosen Gunther from Friends to linger nervously beside my telly and deliver the info whilst serving me a tiny muffin).

And in this instance, all you would hear from this post is “settling is not an option. I repeat: SETTLING IS NOT AN OPTION.”

You know why? Because settling is not an option. In any aspect of life.

By All Means, Settle Down

That’s not what this is about. This isn’t directed at the act of getting comfortable with life, this is entirely focused on the notion that too many people too often divulge in: that they’re not good enough to get exactly what it is they want.

That they have to settle, instead. For second best, for something worse, for something lesser. And let me tell you now, that is never true.

Do you know why it is so regularly repeated that you are the one who gets to define your worth? Because, my friends, it’s true. (I know! Apparently some things you read on the internet aren’t total lies. I wonder if more people know this?)

And that does not in any way mean that if you tell yourself you’re unworthy, then that becomes your new legal status within the world. Oh ho ho no. What it means is you are worthy — of everything.

Let that thought settle in your mind. And then never settle for anything ever again.

You Are Pretty Enough

Son, you’re gorgeous.

I hate that you ever thought that you weren’t. I hate that somebody else’s definition of pretty has led you to believe that you’re not, because you are, you are, and I know for a fact that I’m not the only person who thinks — who knows — that.

You don’t look like them. They don’t look like you. That’s friggin’ ace, because it just so turns out that you are not them and they are not you and whilst you might be watching that handful of people over there checking them out, you haven’t quite noticed the handful of people over here checking you out.

Forget about what everybody else looks like. Ignore the idea that your standard of beauty does not match up to the rest of the world’s.

Diminish that damaging thought that you are not pretty enough for the boy you deem wildly attractive, too attractive for me, hot damn no, people would pity him if they ever saw us out together. Because that’s a lie. You’re breathtakingly beautiful and there are endless lines of people who agree, who advocate that.

But also, screw what anybody else thinks. The only thing that matters is that you think, that you know that, yourself.

But also also, since when did your appearance in any way reflect your soul? The only beauty that matters is the colour of your heart. Let it shine golden.

You Are Capable Enough

The gal who invented space station batteries? You can do that too (not literally that. Because as you can clearly see, that’s already been invented).

The guy who has become a renowned local darts champion? You can be that too.

The people who are feeling spiritually at peace within themselves that have emigrated to a tiny island off the Amalfi coast to embrace their inner awakening? You can feel that too.

We all started off as nothing more than Potential. Before we were conceived (and we won’t discuss exactly how. That’s something I’d suggest asking your mama about), we existed only as a possibility. An infinitesimal chance that might mean that it’s us who gets to be born. And fortunately, we were, here we are, all of us together, equal parts lucky and equal parts meant to be.

When we emerge fresh from the womb, we all possess the exact same amount of potential to do anything, everything, to go out and change the world for the better. You are as capable as the tiny baby that was sneezed out in the hospital bed next to yours. You can do anything, make anything, become anything.

And if you think otherwise? Just know that you are capable of changing that thought, too.

You Are Important Enough

Wildly important. Inherently important. Universally important. You are more than important. And you should be the most important thing in your whole damn life. You are important enough.

Do not let the thought that you aren’t settle in your mind.

Do not accept things simply because you think you aren’t worthy of something better. Do not live a life that is anything other than exactly what you adore, merely because you do not believe you’re important enough to deserve it.

You define your importance. You define your whole entire life. You are the central character in your story, the protagonist, the main focus, and this world is comprised of your invested, eager readers just desperate for your plot to unfold spectacularly. So make it bloody spectacular, eh?

We Settle, But We Shouldn’t

What we settle for is how we describe ourselves to the universe. It’s showcasing our personal perception of who we are, and that we don’t even rank ourselves within our own Top Ten.

But it doesn’t have to be like that.

“We accept the love we think we deserve.” — Stephen Chbosky

So why not think that you deserve the absolute, most spellbinding best? Because that way, that’s exactly what you’ll acquire.

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Mind Cafe

Relaxed, inspiring essays about happiness.

Emily Wilcox

Written by

I will gladly pawn my astrophysics degree for more biscuits.

Mind Cafe

Mind Cafe

Relaxed, inspiring essays about happiness.

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