You Are Unhappy Because You Want to Control The Uncontrollable
An attachment to control is a source of suffering
Humans have a natural tendency to seek control and stability in their lives. We often desire to shape our circumstances, influence outcomes, and manage the variables that impact our well-being.
The desire for control arises from our need for security and stability.
We want to ensure that things go according to our plans and expectations. Hence, our attachment to specific outcomes or circumstances, believing that our happiness depends on them.
Epictetus explains it beautifully: “Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle: Some things are within our control, and some things are not. It is only after you have faced up to this fundamental rule and learned to distinguish between what you can and can’t control that inner tranquility and outer effectiveness become possible.”
Our unhappiness stems from the tension between our desire for control and the reality of the uncontrollable.
Fixating on uncontrollable factors like other people’s actions and decisions, past events and circumstances, past events and circumstances, economic cycles, and timing or luck is a waste of precious time.