Let’s Talk About Persian Culture and Mental Health Care
Author — Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Parisa Saleminik
The influence that culture has on mental health care is profound. Whether we are born into cultures, or we find them along our journey, our communities and traditions can shape our perspectives. Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Parisa Saleminik has personal and professional experience with these cultural/ethnic challenges. Here’s a quick Q&A discussing how she’s navigated these barriers.
Can you talk about which Persian cultural values may contribute to the stigma of mental health care?
The Persian culture is very a proud culture.
Portraying that “perfect” image to other Persians is everything. Growing up as a first-generation Persian American, all of my experiences were shaped around that understanding. From a very young age, my parents had us learn everything about the Persian culture. I was put into Farsi classes so that I could learn to read, write and speak Farsi fluently. Feelings were never discussed.
It wasn’t until I was in high school were a good friend of mine pointed out to me that I never responded back to her “I love you’s.” I shared with her that I was never taught to say “I love you.” Of course, I knew my parents loved me but we never spoke about it. I learned that night, that my parents were also never told I love you by their parents. From that moment on, I made it a point to say I love you to my family and at this moment started to welcome this concept of verbalizing my feelings even though it conflicted with our culture.
How has mental health stigma impacted the way you grew up and your own personal milestones?
When my youngest sister was 4 years old, she was diagnosed with ADHD and Asperger’s. Receiving the diagnosis was a huge shock to my parents and they began worrying about what “they had done wrong and why their child?” Immediately, my parents had my youngest sister meeting with a psychologist and psychiatrist and began receiving treatment. That was my first personal experience in witnessing mental health care and how it can help.
Mental illness has always been a taboo subject in the Persian culture. If someone is struggling with mental illness, no one discusses it; otherwise, it would “ruin” the perfect image. I was taught that only “crazy” people seek out therapy, that there is nothing wrong, and you “just need to get over it.”
Our experience with my sister, and my choice to study psychology has pushed our family to challenge our values. We’ve grown significantly stronger since we have.
How did your family respond when you chose to study psychology?
When I first started undergrad, I had chosen biology as my major, you know the typical Persian major. For Persian parents, the majors that are acceptable are medicine, law, or engineering. After my 3rd year in undergrad, I realized I was no longer passionate about biology, and decided to focus on developing my minor in psychology into a major. As you would imagine, I didn’t have my parents support right out of the gate “what are you going to do with psychology, you’ll never make a career out of it.” Eight years later, my family has grown a lot in understanding about mental health and psychology.
Would you say certain diagnoses are more taboo than others? Can you debunk any of those perspectives?
Yes, many Persians deal with depression and bipolar for years without help because they (or others) believe they are just “lazy or need to get over it”. Another reason Persians might not seek help is the possibility of needing medication to manage their symptoms, or for fear of being judged by others in their community.
Reputation is a driving force for Persians which can factor into why many Persian will not reach out for help. We are witnessing people suffering and believing that they either “deserved their illness or they will get better,” when in reality these diagnoses are more common than people think, and there many different strategies to help people feel better.
Building insight is the starting point for reducing the stigma around getting help.
What strategies can you recommend to people being pulled between cultural norms and needing to get help?
Reaching out is the most important strategy I can offer to anyone struggling with mental illness. Whether you reach out to a therapist or a friend, there is someone who will listen and offer support. Many times, people feel alone and believe they have to suffer and deal with their struggles on their own when in reality that is not the case. Research is the other strategy I suggest to clients, education is the key to empowerment.
Are there resources you’re aware of that folks can look to for more curated culturally relevant support?
Here are a few resources to start with:
