Trauma Time

A short reflection on an fictionalized encounter with a real terror of a therapist …

I tell of my trauma. The terrors that keep me up at night. Unable to connect. Cannot continue.

Therapist tells me EMDR (eye movement desensitization and reprocessing) will heal me.

And so I surrender to this therapist’s tricks.

We begin in silence.

He takes his right hand, index finger up.

Moves his finger in front of my face.

Left to right

Right to left.

Rapid repeats…

I feel his breath

in and out.

So we breathe together.

Breathing in

Breathing out.

His right hand continues clock-like in front of my face.

Left hand is out of sight. But I feel a touch.

Up and down

Down and up

Up and down

Down and up.

Rapid repeats …

Processing pain.

He doesn’t speak.

But his eyes tell me this is progress.

So I breathe.

And believe.

Rapid repeats …

His rhythm method moves me forward.

Left to right

Up and down

Right to left

Down and up.

Session over.

We depart in silence.

My trauma feels released.

I’m now connected.

As his client.

Our bonding begins.

It’s trauma time.

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