Am I In Nirvana?

Or Am I Unwell?

Someone recently asked this question on an online forum.

Question: I have no desires (no material ones at least), no emotions (one emotion I did feel was anger, but I don’t even feel that anymore). I just feel secure and safe, at peace. What is this? What am I?

A few people responded with answers like — congratulations you’re in Nirvana, you’ve achieved Moksha. Here’s my answer — which is markedly different.

Response: I would consider seeing a therapist and performing a more sustained self-examination. Humans cannot survive without the satisfaction of material and emotional needs. Either you’re not being honest with yourself, or there may be something wrong.

I would also be wary of claims you’ve achieved enlightenment.

Question: Please tell me, how could I perform a more sustained self-examination? And why would I not be honest with myself? And what could be wrong?

Response: Great Questions.

In response to your first question, I’d recommend talking with a therapist. Over the long term you might consider meditation.

I’m not saying you’re being intentionally dishonest. But for me, meditation practice has been very useful as a counterpoint to my personal delusion that I’ve got it all together.

Sitting quietly with yourself tends to uncover and amplify my little quirks, emotions, and other chinks in my calm collected self-image. It also reminds me that these are an inherent quality of being human.

If, as you say, you have no emotions, then you’re losing an important part of your humanity. This could be a dissociative state or worse some form of sociopathy. It’s seems worth checking out.

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Andrew Furst is and author, meditation teacher, buddhist blogger, poet, @ellozen curator, photographer, artist, & technologist.

He writes daily on www.andrewfurst.net

Originally published at www.andrewfurst.net on July 6, 2015.