Meet our friend Kerene

No longer busy or suffering, but still successful…

So where are you from, Kerene?

I’m from Tasmania! I grew up there, then moved to NZ in the early 80’s, to the far north.

What was it like growing up in Tasmania?

I spent a lot of my time in the bush, building forts, and swimming in the ocean — a bit of a feral kid, really, when I look back now. I’m so conservative now… or maybe I just look conservative…

What was your family life like?

One younger brother, Damian. Parents… Hmmm, Not a happy childhood in many ways. However. I was a really happy kid. I went to all girls Catholic schools for some of the time. Taught by feminist Nuns. I loved it! I liked education — I was good at it. So I suppose I had a happy childhood, despite the not so wonderful family circumstances.

I went to all girls Catholic schools for some of the time. Taught by feminist Nuns. I loved it!

I came to NZ as a Registered Nurse when I was 23, with my Kiwi then-boyfriend (who I later married). Culture shock! Not the same as Australia. I didn’t know anyone, and had no family. All of a sudden I was married with children! Initially I had no plans of staying here… but 30-something years later and I’m still here.

How did that happen?

I ask myself the same question… my sons were both born in Tutukaka, a beautiful part of NZ… an idyllic childhood going to Ngunguru school right on the seashore. I’m very attached to the far north… I just don’t want to live there.

I moved into nursing education, when nursing shifted into the Tertiary sector in the mid 80s. I taught for 16 years — everything from pathophysiology, pain management, research and leadership. I also did my bachelors and masters during that time. The masters meant coming to Victoria University regularly, and I fell in love with Wellington.

Toward the end of my education career (the last 7 years) I was in a head of department role. I trained as a coach to lead teams to write a new degree then to put that online. There were a lot of hurdles because the NZ bodies (Nursing Council and TEC) were hard to convince that this was a good thing, and they didn’t have the tools to audit these new “Online degrees”, so I created them as well. It was 2006 I think when final approval came through. It was my swansong and I prompted resigned straight after. I was burnt out and needed a change.

The blended online degree program allowed students in the far north to study remotely — meaning they didn’t have to come to the main campus in Whangarei as much. This was really important to the Maori students in particular. And we have a significant shortage of Maori Registered Nurses.

We’ve got so much inequality in the far north with access to education. Maori students need to stay closer to whanau for a variety of reasons and responsibilities . Many were solo mums. When we first started offering education further up North, we drove up and hosted the course at smaller campuses at like Kaitaia, Kerikeri, and eventually graduated 22 Maori students. It was really powerful, the communities were really appreciative. But it was too resource intensive — it doubled the cost of everything. The community was pissed off with me when I refused to do this again. So I promised to find another way to bring nursing education. It took us 2.5 years to develop the program, get accreditation, and roll it out. Our budget was $250k, to put a degree online with a small team. I’ve had people say it would normally cost millions. We did it on a shoestring.I’ve always taken things on because I can be quite naive. In a good way. I think if I really knew what was in front of me, if I could have see it, I probably wouldn’t go there.

My boss came back from a holiday with a postcard for me. “It reminded me of you” she said. The quote on the card was ‘Impossible is just a dare!’ I quite like that.

When I resigned, I started my own coaching business, got remarried, got re-divorced (short marriage, long story), and moved to Wellington in 2010. I got a great job as a senior consultant working in career management in the corporate sector — another good culture shock.

Being an educator, and being a coach with a neuroscience bent, I came to mindfulness when I hit rock bottom, and (I like to think) meditation allowed me to rise up like a phoenix from the ashes.

Prior to that I was a very busy career woman. I needed to care for myself. I went through a major personal crisis (second divorce) so I took on a daily mindfulness meditation practice.

I had a lot of hippy friends growing up, but I needed the science.

I’m mesmerised by how the mind works, how we can create joy or misery, and everything in between.

What let you step into these ambitious projects then?

I think you first and foremost have to back yourself — you’ve got to trust yourself. There will always be criticism. And just because you can do it, doesn’t mean you should do it. Get your “why” very clear and act from a ‘Service leadership’ place. You’ve got to ask yourself, how can I do good here? How can I serve? And get your ego out of the way… that’s a powerful combination.

If you’re really passionate about what you’re doing, you can’t help but inspire other people. You’ve got to push the boundaries.

A wonderful guy Mark Strom gave a great talk at a conference down here, about being a ‘responsible subversive’.

To hold what you’re doing as precious and push the boundaries, but have your heart in the right place. And to be savvy too. It’s hard to explain.

When I was running the change workshops for large corporates, I’d talk about mindfulness and neuroscience as part of it. It turned out that mindfulness and neuroscience was what everyone really wanted to talk about! But I wasn’t there to do that. So “My Off Switch” programme was born. I tell people I didn’t so much write it as download it — it just flowed out of me. It’s a mindfulness program for professional people who are busy, successful and suffering. Like I used to be.

And it took off. Then I realised “Oh shit, do I know what I’m doing?”. I’d done quite a lot of education, trained with Dr Joe Dispenza in the States, but I felt I needed more formal training. I did mindfulness teacher training at the Gawler Foundation in Aussie, and also took on a few mentors, who have been wonderful — Stephen Archer, Janet Etty Leal. I plan on asking Paul Bedson, who teaches at the Gawler center (he’s amazing) and Michael Bunting, who wrote ‘The Mindful Leader’ and is coming to talk at our conference next year at Te Papa. Watch this space.

I think it’s important to surround yourself with those who are experts in the field. You need a sounding board and you need support. That support comes in a variety of ways. Mindfulness for Change is part of that. Working with people who can improve my programs is part of that — like with Pete and Michael on the app. Working with marketing people, and designers. It really helps to work with people who have an understanding of mindfulness. Logan, who does the My Off Switch design work has done my course — so he has great ideas about what is need.

Martin Giles and Wendy Weber and I also developed a program, which didn’t take off because they both got too busy. But they’ve been important mentors to me and continue to be so. They critique my work, and I listen to what they say.

When people do the ‘My Off Switch’ program they change and improve their lives considerably, in ways they never thought possible, which is really affirming.

I’m selling a program to a busy professional. And those people are programmed to NOT be present and are quite risk averse. So anything slightly “woo woo” is going to turn them off. It’s almost like dealing with a completely unconscious person, who doesn’t know, that they don’t know. They’re successful (in the work they do) and are financially rewarded (they’d get a tick from mainstream society) but they’re often exhausted and overwhelmed by everything on their plate. Like there’s a big gaping, soul-hole that needs healing. They need to find a way to switch off and counterbalance all the ‘busyness’. Hence the name of my programme.

When I do speaking events, and talk to people about mind-wandering and anxiety, so many people say “Yes! that’s me. I’m exhausted”.

Brene brown talks about exhaustion as a status symbol and productivity as self-worth.

The more we live in busy mode, the more we program ourselves to suffer.

And self care is often seen as selfish. People are hypnotised with ‘I’ve got so much to do. I’ve got to put other people first.’ But everything suffers if we don’t give ourselves permission to stop. If I can get people to experience stopping, and get them comfortable with it, they see the benefits, then they’re far more likely to continue practising mindfulness.

What brought you to Mindfulness for Change?

Martin Giles. He’d started meeting up with Nick Laurence and Sam O’Sullivan. I really liked the energy of the people. I liked how smart and creative the people were as well. It’s so easy with everything going on in the world to think that everything is going to hell in a handbasket. But there are so many people who have the power to transform and change things. And when I go to Mindfulness for Change events, that’s where I see those people.

It can be really lonely experience running a business on your own, so it’s really good to have people around to support you.

What has been the result of coming to Mindfulness for Change for you?

Um… The connections. We wouldn’t be doing this app if it weren’t for MfC. We wouldn’t be doing the Mindful Leaders Conference. I doubt I’d be working with Stephen Archer. I wouldn’t have met Crystal Price, who did a wonderful animation for me (LINK).

What impact has Mindfulness had on your life/how has Mindfulness helped you?

It lightens life up really. It allows me to experience life, rather than living in the running commentary of it. It makes me a nicer person. It also, for me, helps my creativity and my communication. I know when my head’s clear and flexible, and I know when it is agitated and congested. Two totally different states. It feels like being awake in my life rather than sleepwalking through it.

What does being part of the Mindfulness for Change community mean to you?

It means possibility. It means connection. It means support. It means possibility to co-create in the future.

Is there any help or support you would like from the community to take your project or event to the next level?”

I’d really appreciate invitations to speak to your businesses to talk about mindfulness in the workplace or run a program.

And I want them to share the word to get people to come to the Mindfulness leaders conference. Get involved! We’ll be needing volunteers… it would be really helpful if you can share this link though your businesses: confer.co.nz/mindfulleaders2018. It’s going to be at Te Papa. (Kerene, it’s so handy that you can see Te Papa from your window while you dream up the event…)

Thanks for taking the time for this Kerene, see you at our next app development sprint meeting! 😉