Minds Magazine
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Minds Magazine

The Interview

Skull of a Skeleton with Burning Cigarette by Vincent Van Gogh
  1. Who are you?
  2. You take tomorrow, a bright sunny summer day, off for a whole personal day by yourself. You can’t see anyone else, and are free from all obligations. What is the schedule of your day in a rambling run-on sentence with minimal punctuation to encourage a stream of conscious answer?
  3. What is your ideal morning like in a rambling run-on sentence with minimal punctuation to encourage a stream of conscious answer?
  4. How would you describe your artistic style or personality with as many (6 or more) extravagant words you’d like to include?
  5. Do people have an impression of you with which you either agree or disagree?
  6. Do you like going places by yourself for food, movies, museums, or with drugs, etc.?
  7. Do you have any life mottos right now?
  8. Do you journal in any way? If so, describe your process.
  9. What books have you read this year? Describe your reading habits? If you don’t read, what’s your excuse?
  10. Do you have any form of synesthesia or an unusual sense?
  11. Is the Internet dystopian or utopian?
  12. What kind of person were you like in school growing up?
  13. What generation do you consider yourself, how do you think your generation is doing, what’s the thing you like least about your generation, and what do you think of the generation following yours? Preceding yours?
  14. Do you have a bookcase, music playlist, stack of movies, or any other collection that you organize in a specific way?
  15. Who was your first favorite auteur in either music, literature, film, or another art, and why?
  16. What other auteurs throughout your life have really affected you for a month or more, and why?
  17. Do you have a studio or favorite work space? Describe it.
  18. Is your notes app on your phone well-organized or a mess?
  19. What is your favorite presentation of art, and why does it captivate you? (i.e. live concerts, going to art museums, big screen film theaters in the dark, playing an immersive video game, graphic novels, etc.)
  20. What is something you feel you pick up on and have sensory awareness of that other people don’t seem to notice?
  21. Do you have a third eye with people? What does it pay attention to?
  22. What is the most macabre thing about you?
  23. Give me one of your regrets in life and one of your triumphs.
  24. What is the accomplishment or work you’ve struggled with the longest?
  25. Do you keep more long-term or short-term goals?
  26. Favorite city, and why?
  27. Are you proud of your native country?
  28. Do you see your parents in yourself?
  29. Do you have any famous ancestors, or fun family legends?
  30. Have you ever trespassed somewhere?
  31. Which of the 7 Deadly Sins is your favorite to sin?
  32. What’s a total blindspot you know you have in life?
  33. What’s the deepest rabbit hole on some unusual topic you’ve dug into?
  34. Have you ever protested anything? Boycotted anything?
  35. Here’s $15,000 to go on vacation for a month alone. Where do you go, and what is your plan?
  36. Do you have any moral crusades, pet peeves, or “Kids these days!” furies?
  37. You can have cocktails with one dead person from 10pm till the bar closes, who?
  38. What odd talents or skills do you low-key develop?
  39. What odd niches or aesthetics have you enjoyed exploring?
  40. Have you ever gotten really into any ism?
  41. What art or skill are you really bad at with no natural ability, but you really wish you were good at?
  42. What’s something you’re really good at but aren’t impressed or interested in being good at it?
  43. What has been your best personal innovation in your personality?
  44. What is the goal you have worked the hardest for but still failed?
  45. What is the best joke or story you tell people about yourself?
  46. Was there ever a time you consciously chose to re-orient your life toward a totally different life plan, goal, or outlook?
  47. You die today. What was your life’s magnum opus?
  48. Do you have any superstitions?
  49. Do you live a secular or numinous life?
  50. What’s the most unexplained thing that has happened to you?
  51. What’s a recent profound thing you’ve thought, read, or seen that has stayed with you for a month or more?
  52. Do you have any unusual memories from childhood that aren’t very formative or significant, but are just simple, plain, or random that frequently come back to you for some reason?
  53. Are there any talents or hobbies you had in childhood that you gave up on?
  54. Do you have any personal end of year or new year rituals or traditions to either plan out some or all of the next year, or analyze the year that just finished?
  55. What was the best compliment someone ever gave you?
  56. Do you have any childhood classmates to whom you compare your life and have ambition to accomplish more than?
  57. Would your grade school self recognize him or herself in you right now?
  58. If you could relive your life from high school with the knowledge and experiences you have now, would you want to?
  59. If you have kids, how have they changed your philosophy of life?
  60. Your life is a Greek tragedy. What fatal flaw of yours led you to hubris and your downfall?
  61. What question should I have asked but didn’t that illuminates you?
  62. Have you ever gone viral on social media to an extent that surprised you? What did you do?
  63. If we medically solve aging in 2060 so that humans can live forever, would you choose immortality at 80+/- years old or find relief from death?
  64. What contemporary trends right now are you most interested in, and do you think these trends will be significant still in 2050? Social, political, or cultural.
  65. In some number of years many of your current body’s cells will mostly be replaced, and you will be for the most part physically a cellularly different person. Pleasant or uncomfortable thought?
  66. One hundred and fifty years from now, a statue exists of you in a public park and your plaque has fallen off, and the memory of you has faded, and now no one can remember who you were or what you did. What did you do to deserve that statue?
  67. Have you told any lies in this interview?
  68. How would you rate your cognizance of self-reflection after thinking about these questions?
  69. In two sentences describe how you think you’ve described yourself with all of your answers.

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Dash MacIntyre

Dash MacIntyre

Comedian, political satirist, and poet. Created The Halfway Post, and is publishing comedy lots of places. Follow THP on Twitter to read my Dada journalism.