Damein Jackson
Learn From The People
Peace To You
“What you are thinking about, you are becoming”, said the great Muhammad Ali. When it comes to the topic of a fixed mindset, Carol Dweck believes a fixed mindset can be changed when taught with the main focus on development, ideas regarding challenge and effort will follow. My own opinion is that in order to gain a growth mindset, one must face their true characteristics and put in the effort to recognize that this is a lifetime journey and the fixed mindset will be there at times, but being aware and in control are what matter. I grew up with a fixed mindset for the majority part of my life never having the right support or guidance to tell me right from wrong. School has always been my biggest challenge for the simple fact I’d always tell myself, “I’m not smart enough to learn that”, “You can’t get into those types of school you aren’t smart to get accepted.” I always had these inner mental battles with myself, not having the correct resources to show myself there are other ways to think positively and do better for myself. My life journey is a perfect example of Dweck’s claims that the mind can and must be changed. I had to truly learn about the growth mindset which put a major shift in my thoughts and life overall. The most difficult part was challenging myself to get out of my comfort zone, adapting to these new ways of thinking let me appreciate everything I had dealt with prior. The growth mindset isn’t a set of rules, but more of a process of finding new ways and seeking input from others. “A growth mindset is about believing people can develop their abilities.” In making this comment, Dweck urges us to trust in ourselves that in this process of growth you will unlock our potential in becoming your best self and gaining the abilities needed to help live life.
While it is true that praising your children is important to their development and growth, it does not mean to praise them in a manner where one negative comment or any type of criticism shuts down them. According to Dweck, “every word and action can send a message”, which tells children, students, and athletes how to view, feel and think about themselves. There’s nothing wrong with praise, letting the children know they’ve done well of course, but there must be a certain way to approach these situations so they aren’t hurting them as they grow up. Praising the children based on their intelligence or talent can be a recipe for disaster which can put them in a deeply fixed mindset. Finding ways to appreciate them as much as they need must be a growth-oriented process, being able to accomplish tasks with practice, study, and good strategies. Although I do know some readers may object, I understand parenting is a very difficult task, and giving your child the best compliments as they grow up is extremely important. But as parents being conscious of how the praise is given must be taken into consideration for later on in their child’s life.
Creating a good conversation with the children asks them about their work in ways it highlights and exhibits interest in their choices and efforts. In Dweck’s view, at times people will be mindful to use growth-oriented praise with their children but then ruin it by the way they speak to others. In his book Mindset, Dweck maintains that he’s heard parents say in front of their children, “He’s just a born loser,” which makes complete sense on why children find themselves in a fixed mindset early in their years and stop them from experiencing life. Many naysayers would disagree with Dweck’s approach that there shouldn’t be a limit or growth-oriented way on how they should praise their children. Keep in mind most naysayers can’t grasp the idea of having positive outlooks on life or situations for anyone else because they don’t envision themselves making a positive transformation. Even with these types of circumstances, a growth mindset is still possible having been raised with false praise and low self-esteem. Many people have to rewire their mindsets, at times completely reprogramming your brain to heal and have a growth mindset where you can be your true self in this real world. As the prominent coach John Wooden puts it, “I believe the ability can get you to the top, but it takes character to keep you there…”
When you don’t come from much, life feels like quicksand becoming real slow and hard to deal with. In high school, I was always friends with the smartest kids on campus, but I never did well in school unless it was basketball season. My efforts would completely change my mindset, training every day, studying to make sure I passed my classes to play in the season, but once that was done it was immediately back to the fixed mindset. I lived this way until I was twenty-seven years old when I suddenly realized the power of the mind. Finally facing the hardest challenge of my life, which was being done with basketball for good, was the hardest pill to swallow. I had played since I was nine years old, having to walk away from something I knew all my whole life put me in a state of depression for 2 years.
Truthfully, I had given up on everything as a whole in my life, and having a fixed mindset that things would never change or get better, was happening because I was allowing it to. I had to deal with some things personally and really put forth the effort to better my mind, and life to get back to who I am and need to become. Facing your deepest and darkest thoughts is what will get you to a better place of gratitude, putting your self-development first will help to navigate through life easier. Consider better strategies, teaching yourself more, practice harder, and work your way through obstacles.
Not allowing my ego or pride to get the best of me was one of the best decisions I made, in order to be where I am today. I may not be in the best place physically, but I completely understand what it takes now to stay focused with a growth mindset keeping myself accountable daily in order to make sure I’m my best self for the ones around me and to help others who are dealing with these same struggles. You must accept to be vulnerable to yourself and your thoughts keeping in mind that you no longer have to be those thoughts or that person anymore. As Warren Bennis states, “I believe… that everyone, of whatever age and circumstance, is capable of self-transformation”. We deal with much pain and trauma all we know is to keep it inside which in the end only ends up destroying ourselves. The growth mindset will bring you peace within yourself you never thought was possible and once you get there, you’ll never look back. It’s not how you start, but how you finish.
Countless people are locked up in a fixed mindset which for the most part has served them a good purpose, showing them who they were or who they wanted to be and were shown how to be that. Asking people to change their mindset is asking them to let go of everything they know and to finally face the challenges and struggles that come along with the growth mindset. The feeling can be uncomfortable and, at times, depressing. Only moving forward meeting those challenges with effort is what will get you to the growth mindset. Life is a long journey bringing us ups and downs at all times, which at times can have us drifting away from the meaning of a growth mindset and its benefits.“Those with the growth mindset found success in doing their best, in learning and improving. And this is exactly what we found in the champions.” (Dweck, pg. 98). No one is perfect. Many times we’re in one mindset and sometimes we’re in the other. We must then recognize what triggers our fixed mindset. Once we get into that fixed mindset is when we begin to judge and deal with information received from other people.
Having an appreciation for your journey on attaining the growth mindset should be peaceful and inspiring to become your true best self over time. I agree with Tiger Woods when he says, “I know my game. I know what I want to achieve, I know how to get there.” Every day won’t be the best, but your mindset is what will always determine your outcome on how things will end up. Dweck’s great work has helped millions of people face their mindset battles head on to overcome what a lot of people deem to be impossible, changing your mental mindset. Following the process with true efforts can take you a long way when staying on track to the growth mindset. It’ll let you be the person you should have always been without judging the world and thinking about how you can improve. Constantly and consistently bettering your abilities, motivation, and progression daily gives you the strength to take responsibility for your life.
The growth mindset won’t solve all your problems, but it’ll give you a different life where you can feel alive, lionhearted, and becoming a better person because of it. The only person who can decide on whether this change is right for you is yourself. You must envision yourself becoming the growth mindset, constantly in your thoughts, and some days it might not be for you. But as the great Alex Rodriguez said: “You either go one way or the other”, we all have to make the best choices possible for ourselves. Meaning showing for yourself so when obstacles or tough times may come along, you must be able to turn it on to keep yourself from the fixed mindset. Once a situation improves don’t forget to continue work that got you to where you are now.
