The Day I Almost Stopped Dancing

I wrote this story as one of my assignments for the Storytelling for Change MOOC by+Acumen and The Ariel Group. I recommend this course for anyone and everyone who wants to tell their story in a more impactful way. The version here has been edited slightly to fit the Medium context.

All of you do something which other people in your life refer to as your hobby. Singing. Acting. Playing guitar. Anything that gives you pure joy.

Deep down, you know it is more than a hobby. It is what you do when you’re not tied up with work or personal commitments. It’s what you think of 80% of the time.

For me, it’s dancing. I’ve been doing it all my life. Even now, despite having a 9-to-5 job, I still dream of becoming a dancer. My dance journey has faced many obstacles yet I persevered because it is my true passion.

I want to tell you about the first time I encountered a obstacle in my path to becoming a dancer.

I’m in a small classroom in Dhaka, Bangladesh. It’s a hot summer afternoon, the day after the school’s annual talent show, which I’d taken part in.

“What you did on that stage yesterday was not dance!” The teacher’s voice booms in the tiny classroom with only 10 students. She carries on. She tells me about others who danced better than me and what ‘real dance’ looked like.

Her words turn nine-year-old Fariha’s stomach to lead. I can feel my face becoming burning red. I try to act normal and as if her words are not crushing me in front of my peers.

At this point, I have already been dancing for three years. My dance teachers give me feedback all the time. Constructive criticism is something nine-year-old me can work with.

But, for the first time in my life, someone is putting me down without offering anything in return. I do not know how to respond! I’m too young, scared and humiliated to demand that she tell me how to actually improve.

I go home that afternoon, discouraged and demotivated like never before. Hearing about my day, my mother pulls me into a soft, loving hug and teaches this valuable lesson: “Not everyone has your best interests in mind, BUT this should not stop you from doing what you love.”

She also adds this little nugget: “Not every criticism is valid, so you must learn to weed out the ones that don’t matter.”

Despite this incident (the memory of which still turns my stomach to lead), I have never stopped dancing.

So this is my message to all aspiring artists: passion and drive come from deep within you. Do not let anyone crush it with meaningless comments.

For those who are interested, here is a video of me narrating this story.