Swipe Left on The Sex Expo
Despite the titillating entrance — think a red tunnel that opens up onto semi-naked hotties feeding you shots — the expo itself wasn’t the experience I was hoping for.
The last time I went to the Expo, I was not only a Sex Expo virgin, but also, literally, a virgin. My prudish and inexperienced younger self was both scandalised and intrigued by the blatant sexuality on display. As I wrote for Fairlady at the time, “I felt accosted by penii (sounds better than penises, no?) as I walked around the venue. All the while amateur — volunteers from the audience — porn stars were loudly panting and moaning while grabbing each other’s butts on stage, and people dressed in lewd, almost nude, costumes strutted around the CTICC with forced sexiness.”
In the past 13 years, a lot of things have changed. Alternative sexual and romantic lifestyles like BDSM, polyamory and even sex toy usage, are more normalised and commonplace than they were in the early 2000s. The #MeToo movement that peaked in 2017 launched a wave of understanding about consent that has washed through every sphere, including parenting.
I’ve also changed — quite significantly. The last time I went to this expo, I had just dipped my toes into relationships and the intimacy that goes with that. I was figuring out sex, consent, pressure, what I liked, what I wanted, and how that worked with what someone else likes and wants. Now I’m a married mother and oh boy! Sex, my body, and a long-term relationship with a man who knows me inside and out is a totally different scenario.
One thing that hasn’t changed? The Sex Expo.
Golden penises abound. Prickasso still struts the stalls, displaying everything but the kitchen sink and painting questionable art. The silhouette show is as graphic (and fake) as in 2010. The stage is littered with enthusiastic amateurs and many fan-favourite stalls and acts are predictably there.
But like sexuality today, The Sex Expo was a nuanced affair with parts to love and parts that were, well, less loveable.
Swipe right: What I loved about the expo
Despite it being very much the same, there were also elements that I really enjoyed.
- Sex education: There was a focus on sex education, with Marie Stopes and Famka appearing. The Bondage Corner featured a BDSM couple who demonstrated PG BDSM techniques, which I found genuinely interesting and educational.
- Sex toys are amazing now! Though most stalls had toys from the same brands, I had an excellent experience with Pure Plesier Sensual Boutique. They were professional and showcased the tools helpfully (including the linked app — what!)
- You can go as smutty or smart as you want: Ranging from The Pineapple Lounge and Theatre of Erotica to genuinely helpful workshops on blowjobs and female masturbation, The Sex Expo offers a wide range of experiences.
Swipe left: What I hated about the expo
- Consent means nothing to many of the exhibitors: Though some stalls were great (I loved Juliet Markantonatos’ sensual photography), most had overzealous salesmen who made it feel like I was swatting away an endless cloud of mosquitoes, all consistently pushing past your ‘no’ until you physically walked away from them.
- Same old: I was disappointed to see much of the same stuff, acts and people I saw 13 years ago.
- Deja vu: With many repeat stalls (some had up to three in quite a small area) it soon got a bit boring! I can’t see spending more than two hours at the expo, unless you kill time waiting for a workshop.
Originally published at https://taggedonline.co.za.