My son is 15 and is struggling in school. He always has. We turned a corner in 8th grade, and I thought we were set, but he starts slacking off in high school. He’s in 10th, and it’s bad now. He currently has 3 failing grades.
He’s been diagnosed with depression/anxiety. He’s medicated and receives therapy, and even his therapist says he uses his diagnosis as an excuse. It’s hard for us to tell when he’s genuinely having a hard time instead of when he’s just being lazy and doesn’t want to do something. His brother is the exact opposite. I try not to compare them, but I think I have a good judgment of what is normal teen boy behavior that we won’t stand for and his illness.
I’m at the point where I am ready to say “screw it” and let him fail, but my husband is worried that he won’t graduate high school if we go this route. I have the same worries, but I don’t think I should be caring more about his grades than he does. His brother is 1.5 younger. This morning I woke up, and my other son was already showered, had eaten breakfast, cleaned his dish, and was sitting down doing school. My 15-year-old was still asleep. I knocked on his door 3 times to wake him up, and he still ended up not doing his work. He logged on at noon and half-assed some of the work before closing it down to go back to sleep.
Now he’s in his room drawing. My husband wants to tell him that he needs to finish his work before he can draw, but I’m really tired of sitting over him to make sure work gets done. Do we just let him fail? Is that too harsh?