“AM I DOING THIS RIGHT?” MODERN PARENT CONTEST
9 Developmental Milestones You Can Check When Your Child Has a Speech Delay
Every parent would be thrilled to hear their baby’s first word and eager to hear more from their little one.
I remember when our first son began to say his first words. I was so excited that I bought more of those ‘first words books’ to encourage him to explore more vocabularies. It worked very well for him. At the age of 2, he could speak 2–3-word sentences, and I could have simple conversations with him.
But, our second son was a different story. Reflecting on our experience with our eldest, my husband and I soon realized that our second baby had a speech delay. Yes, he was able to walk at the age of 1 and showed curiosity about things around him. But despite our various efforts to get him to speak, he remained very quiet.
At the age of 2, he could only say simple words — words, not a sentence — and that didn’t even happen every day. Family members and friends advised us to either take him to a baby and child clinic or send him to school. We preferred the latter.
When a nearby preschool announced they were open for admission (our second son was 2.5 years old by then), we couldn’t wait to enroll him into this school. My husband and I both agreed that direct interaction, learning, and playing with peers should come first before deciding on any clinical approach.
Our hopelessness
Mid-March 2020, the pandemic hit the world. Schools closed and abruptly forced them to shift to remote learning virtually from home. From postgraduate studies to preschools, all should be done online.
But, online school for a 3-year-old preschool student? How would that work?
We expected our son to overcome his speech delay by socializing directly with people at school, and now all he would have is a virtual class?
That didn’t make sense.
With my husband and I both working and having our eldest son (5 years old) also needing attention, it just wouldn’t be realistic for us to gain the optimum results for our boy doing online preschool. So, although it was hard for us, we just had to cancel our son’s enrollment into the school.
My anxiety
Over time, going through months of staying at home, as you could have guessed, our son didn’t show much progress in his ability to speak. My anxiety grew as I stared at his eyes, talking to him, only to have a look back from him without any words coming from his lips.
I started listing the words he could speak, counting them, and checking if the number of words reached the minimum for a 3-year-old according to the children’s developmental milestones.
I kept on showing him books, but he was more interested in tearing them than looking at them (almost all of his brother’s books’ economic life ended at his hands).
I was so terribly worried.
That’s why when child clinics started to open adopting strict health protocols, I talked to my husband about taking our boy to one of these clinics for speech therapy. Rather than waiting for the schools to open, perhaps it would be better to do this first.
My husband disagreed. He was sure that our son should have developed other sets of skills apart from speaking. He said that I could have worried so much about his speech delay that I overlooked other developmental aspects in which he had progressed. And that’s when I began checking more closely on our son’s cognitive and physical abilities.
The progress
Our son liked to play with colorful blocks, puzzles, and food toys, pretending he was cooking. As I observed him more, I noticed how he grew his cognitive and physical developmental skills.
These are the 9 developmental milestones that made us believe that our son was doing fine. If your child has a speech delay, you may want to check if he/she can do these, too:
- Solving medium-sized puzzles of 35 pieces, and with an adult’s help, finishing a puzzle consisting of 104 smaller pieces.
- Recognizing colors (I asked my son to get a green coloring pen and he took the right one).
- Recognizing different shapes and categorizing them accordingly.
- Pushing a dining chair closer to the fridge to get something from on top of it — in essence, another problem solving skills.
- Getting his own food. For example, our son would grab a bowl and a spoon from the kitchen cabinet, walk to the dining table, take a portion of soup from the big bowl on the table to his bowl and feed himself (this self-reliance was particularly one where he outperformed his brother at the same age!).
- Brushing teeth by himself.
- Drawing objects of his interest: trains, fish, wheels while holding the pencil with a firm grip.
- Making correlations, such as drawing whales, dolphins, and fish altogether.
- Cutting paper. Our son used scissors using both hands (without an adult’s help) to cut objects he drew on paper — again, another example of self-reliance I didn’t see from his brother at his age.
My husband also came with his observations. We liked to talk about our son’s developmental progress that gave us a more positive feeling.
Speech delay is indeed one of the factors parents must see from a child’s milestones. It’s, however, also imperative to pay attention to other developmental aspects. Falling behind a few abilities doesn’t mean that your child can’t catch up with (or even go beyond) the general milestones. And from my experience, I can tell that speaking is not the only thing.
Disclaimer:
This is a personal story and is not to be taken as a child clinical psychological advice or recommendation. Any child’s developmental milestones concern or condition should be addressed by a child clinical psychologist, pediatrician, or other appropriate health care professional. I published this story because I thought others might find it useful. Please act wisely depending on your child’s needs and conditions. Thank you.
