After You Get His First Text
It might be the beginning of heaven or hell for you
Oh, the excitement. You two have recently connected through a friend/online/ at an event/at the grocery store or wherever
You exchange numbers and so it goes. You anticipate this exchange as the beginning of something magical and wonderful.
But after you get his first text, when you’re still wrapped in the haze of excitement, please wonder about this ladies
It could be the beginning of….
It could be the beginning of the end of your freedom
The beginning of the manipulation and mind games
The beginning of the loss of your sense of self
The beginning of you creating a fantasy of who he is
The beginning of you losing your independence and trust in your instincts
The beginning of you starting to question your sound judgement
The beginning of you justifying his poor treatment of you
The beginning of you losing control of how you spend your free time
The beginning of being so wrapped up in his desires and dreams
The beginning of loosening of your boundaries
This could also be the end of…
The end of your ability to have 100% ownership of your life
The end of your friendships with other people
The end of you having a peaceful evening without strife
The end of your freedom to dress up the way you like
The end of having non-romantic male friendships
The end of girls night out or in
The end of nurturing your connections with your family and supportive community
The end of your right to say no to physical intimate advances
The end of your dreams
The end of your peace of mind
The end of your belief in your capabilities
The end of your sense of serenity and independence
So that new guy that is giving you sparkles In your eye and butterflies in your tummy, could be the same man who will make your life a living hell and lace your heart with poison and endless anxiety down the line.
I write this not to discourage you from embarking on a new relationship, but to encourage you to keep this healthy perspective when navigating the early days.
Perspective is everything. We can choose to love with our hearts and head. That way we can keep a clear mind, and sound judgement whilst getting to know someone new.
