Lies I’ve Told In Taxis
You don’t owe anyone the truth
One day it hit me: I don’t have to tell the truth.
Not telling the truth is my power, my prerogative, when I’m stuck in a metal vehicle with (usually) a man driving.
I can’t count the number of times that I’ve been in a taxi/Uber when the driver has proceeded to ask me a barrage of personal questions, or has decided to present me with a monologue of their lives.
Sometimes this has been well meant, and other times I’ve felt vulnerable.
When you’re in a taxi, the driver has the position of power. They control the vehicle, the speed, the route. You are paying them for a service, true, but once you enter the car, the power is in their hands.
You trust that they will drive you safely to your destination.
I don’t take taxis out of choice, but necessity, and I prefer Ubers where the driver has ratings, I have a chance to review, I can see the route on my screen, and I have an estimate of price ahead of the journey.
Since I’m a reasonably polite person, and I’ve been brought up to be compliant, I thought I only had two options when presented with these questions: tell the truth or be rude and barely answer.
Telling the truth always felt like I was giving too much of myself away against my own will. I don’t know this person. I don’t want to know the same details about them. But still, I obliged, because that’s what I was taught to do.
Being rude and barely answering sometimes worked out well and sometimes didn’t.
Sometimes the driver would take the hint and stop asking, and sometimes they would react, “What’s your problem love, you don’t want to talk to me?”, “You’re a bit of a posh bird, aren’t you?”.
Worse would be the drivers who felt it necessary to prove their dominance in another way and they would speed up or make a reckless decision to put me in my place.
So when I realised there was a third option, I was relieved.
I could lie.
I wouldn’t give away any of my personal details, and I wouldn’t risk offending/angering the person currently in charge of my safety.
So, what lies have I told? I usually have a few up my sleeve.
- I work for the council, in admin.
- I’m a PA for a manager in xxxx town (change the town depending on current location).
- I was just made redundant, actually, and I’m looking for a new job.
- I’m a journalist and I write articles for travel magazines about travel and culture. (I used this mainly when I lived abroad and I wanted to chat because it was a good opportunity for me to practice my language skills).
Aside from 4, the trick I’ve found is to have a job that seems pretty boring, and fairly vague.
The fewer details given, the better.
I use 3 to generate a bit of sympathy, or to give a reason for me to say something along the lines of, “I’m a bit cut up about it, so I’d rather not talk about it if you don’t mind.” That tends to shut things down pretty nicely.
Of course, there’s always a risk that they ask you something that catches you out, but I’m pretty fast at thinking on my feet.
It doesn’t matter if I don’t make complete sense and my story isn’t 100% coherent. You can always say, “It’s complicated,” or “Things are a bit up and down at the moment.”
People usually assume that you’re telling the truth. Or not. Who cares?!
The likelihood of meeting the driver again is minimal. Preserving your sense of self is more important.