Loving The Stranger Before Me
Abusers come wearing many faces
For too long women in this and other countries across the world were expected to fall in line behind men, supporting cast for the male-dominated lead roles.
With much sacrifice and protesting, we have begun to emerge out of the shadow that for so long has been cast upon us.
After years of fighting to have a voice and to be heard, we have gained so much of the ground that we had fought to stand on. The trouble is that there is still an undeniable double standard taking place, and it may surprise you that it’s not coming from who you might expect.
We as women have fought long and hard to get away from being valued for our sexuality instead of our intellect and capability.
Long have we rallied against sexual discrimination and hostile working environments. Yet for all that effort, there seems to be an emerging trend amongst some women that has us perpetuating the same bad behavior that we protest against.
Less spoken of, and certainly less reported, are women who physically abuse men.
Often times this is not because they are a physical threat or stronger than the man in question. Rather, it’s a matter of knowing that the man they are abusing won’t fight back, mainly because they believe it’s wrong to hit a woman.
Generally speaking, it has been my experience that these women are domineering, emasculating tyrants who belittle and demean their more passive partners, taking advantage of the fact that the man will not retaliate or report the abuse for fear of public ridicule, and disbelief.
This type of double standard is detrimental to our fight for equality, and fair treatment. We cannot expect to have our gender be off-limits in some regards while we use it to our advantage in others.
If we want to be treated in the same manner as our male counterparts, we should be treated in the same manner as our male counterparts. Period.
Most men that I know that get hit or punched by another man are going to hit them back. So why aren’t they supposed to hit a woman back if she hits first?
In my opinion, they have every right to, and I think any woman who raises her hand to a man should do so with the full expectations of getting hit back. Your sex no longer excludes you from being able to succeed in a man’s world. As such, it should not protect you if you decide to put your hands on a man.
I’ve raised two of them myself, and have taught them that they have the right and the obligation to defend and protect themselves against anyone who takes the liberty of putting their hands on them, regardless of what their gender is.
We as women have come too far in our fight to stand on the same playing field as men to have a few weak-minded, sharp-tongued, quick-fisted, unhappy females set us back from our goals.
Abuse is abuse, and it comes in all shapes and sizes. Behind closed doors, people are being hurt by the very people who should love them the most. The fact that the role of victim and the role of perpetrator are not considered the norm makes it no less wrong and no less relevant.
