Teaching Kids to Handle Bullying and Cyber-Bullying
It is important to be aware of what is going on between your kids and their friends.
Many children and teens deal with bullying in school. We have all probably seen this in our own childhood as well. When I was a kid, there was this brother and sister that would follow kids home in elementary school and beat them up or steal their backpacks. Everyone knew about it, but no one really did anything to stop it, teachers included.
Today, there are many programs in schools to combat bullying, with anti-bullying curriculums and anonymous tip lines to report bullying. So if your child or someone they know is being bullied, there are avenues to take to report it. Unfortunately, many children and teens feel ashamed of being bullied, so they will fail to speak up.
If you let your child or teen know that it is safe to talk to you about bullying, and that you are not going to judge them for what happens at school, then they will be more likely to talk to you if something does happen.
Nowadays, kids also have to worry about cyberbullying. According to StopBullying,
“Cyberbullying is bullying that takes place over digital devices like cell phones, computers, and tablets. Cyberbullying can occur through SMS, Text, and apps, or online in social media, forums, or gaming where people can view, participate in, or share content. Cyberbullying includes sending, posting, or sharing negative, harmful, false, or mean content about someone else. It can include sharing personal or private information about someone else causing embarrassment or humiliation. Some cyberbullying crosses the line into unlawful or criminal behavior.
The most common places where cyberbullying occurs are:
- Social Media, such as Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, and Tik Tok
- Text messaging and messaging apps on mobile or tablet devices
- Instant messaging, direct messaging, and online chatting over the internet
- Online forums, chat rooms, and message boards, such as Reddit
- Online gaming communities”
If there is bullying taking place, it is important to let kids know that there is recourse. If bullying is happening online, most apps have the ability to block people from contacting them. Cell phones typically have this capability as well. Kids and teens can also report bullying or cyberbullying to the school, the police, or another trusted adult.
Some ways to deal with bullying and cyberbullying according to Stop Bullying are:
“Specific Strategies Youth Can Use to Deal with Bullying
- Seek assistance from an adult, friend, or classmate when a potentially threatening situation occurs.
- Be assertive (not aggressive, fighting, or teasing back) when possible.
- Use humor to deflect a potential threatening situation.
- Avoid unsafe places or walk away before a potential bullying encounter occurs.
- Agree with or “own” a belittling comment to defuse it.
- Walk with friends or a small group of friendly peers.
- Use positive self-statements to maintain positive self-esteem during an incident.
- Avoid getting emotionally upset when bullying occurs, as this may embolden the person bullying.Strategies Youth Can Use to Prevent Cyberbullying
- Never accept friend or network requests from unfamiliar people.
- Use the “mom” principle: Do not post or share photographs or movies that you would not be willing to share with your mother, father, or another important caregiver.
- Follow the “forever” principle: Assume that everything you put online will be there forever.
- Follow the “no privacy” principle: Assume that everyone can access information about you in cyberspace.
- Follow the “ex” principle: Would you be okay with your ex-boyfriends or girlfriends having access to content that you are planning to share?
- Block threatening or questionable people from seeing your profile and personal information.
- Do not post provocative, scandalous, or inflammatory remarks online.
- Do not reply to or retaliate against incidents of cyberbullying.
- Regularly change passwords to sites and applications, and immediately delete profiles that have been hacked.
- Avoid sites, networks, and applications that have poor security, provide easy access to personal information, or encourage interactions among strangers.
- Ensure that information is approved before it is posted or shared socially.
- Limit involvement in social networking to a few familiar sites.
- Avoid joining sites that do not have adequate privacy settings.
- Never engage in sexting (sharing pictures or messages that have private sexual content).”
When children have positive relationships with trusted adults like parents and teachers, this can be a protective factor against bullying. It is important to let kids know that they can always come to you for help.
When your child sees someone being bullied, they can speak up against the bully to diffuse the situation, or they can let the person being bullied know that they don’t feel the same. If your child feels strongly supported this may be easier for them to do.
Have your kids dealt with bullying? How did you handle it? Let me know in the comments.
