The Need for Discomfort
and how to show up for it?
Choosing discomfort doesn’t come easily for us. We are so tuned in to the comfortable, the familiar, the things that keep us steady and offer stability.
Comfort is a soft pillow where we feel safe, and though it feels good, we do not grow through comfort.
We need discomfort as much as we crave comfort.
Our subconscious mind knows two areas — comfortable and uncomfortable. So, whatever is new and unknown, even if it may be good, is thrown into the uncomfortable category by our subconscious minds.
It takes conscious rewiring to step into discomfort.
But why choose discomfort?
Research suggests that seeking discomfort leads to greater personal growth as it pushes us into the unknown.
Not knowing is scary. We crave certainty in life’s inherent unpredictability. But discomfort means stretching our limits; it means going beyond the parameters of what we once thought possible; it means challenging the impossible ideas in our minds because it is all possible if we get out of our way.
Below are some ways where you can show up for discomfort —
1. Ask yourself, “Why?”
It is always scary before it is done.
Your why needs to be stronger so that you can persevere until the end. It’s hard, but everything is hard in some form or manner. In fact, it is the struggle that shapes you. But if it’s something you want with all your heart, the effort seems effortless, and that is what energizes you, gives you your purpose, and makes it all worth it.
2. Check your inner dialogue
It’s terrifying to not know, but it’s equally challenging at times to comprehend what the inner voice is telling you. Your decisions are based on your past experiences. When you try something new, you encounter many unknowns. That is where you find an inner resistance that tries to convince you to just try things that are known and comfortable.
Saying sentences like,
‘I don’t know, and I’ll figure it out along the way’
and ‘It’s okay not to know; it would be boring if I knew everything.’
Using words or sentences that make you curious and add a sense of wonder takes you back to living in the present moment — not thinking, but living. You feel scared, but you start noticing the sweaty palms and your slow breathing and decide to do it anyway.
3. Set small achievable goals and note your small wins
When you’re on an unknown path, small wins are significant.
It’s so unknown that sometimes you don’t even know what goal you should set. So, all you do in those moments is keep showing up for the thing that you internally feel like acting on and have the trust that you will figure it out through trial and error.
In all those trials and error phases, remember to take note of the things you were scared of, but you did those anyway; on the days you made something impossible possible, on the days things were turning out to be worse, but one small thing you did do that turned everything better.
Note it all down because if it matters to you, it just does matter to you and only you.
4. The ‘faith’ that lives in you
You cannot convince the people you know. You cannot make them understand.
You cannot convince anyone why you are choosing discomfort over comfort.
In those moments, you must believe in that quiet whisper that tells you that you’re on the track you’re supposed to be. Transitions are messy and random, and the faith lives inside you. The people who want the best for you will understand and will still be there to support you.
5. Execute — One step at a time
Be scared and take the first step. Then, make a note.
Be scared and take the second step. And then, make a note.
Eventually, you do feel comfortable and let compounding work its own wonders. All the tiny steps you’ve taken lead to that final big step — the highlight the world is so used to seeing.
6. Take some time to embrace your journey
If you’ve come this far, you have come a long way. As said by Ralph Waldo Emerson,
It’s not the destination; it’s the journey.
It is the process that matters, more than the outcome. So, savor those moments and layers of new aspects you’ve conquered and experienced.
