Today I Turned 26 Years Old…
Here's what 26 really looks like…and some wishes I have for this coming year
On February 28th, 2022, I woke up and I turned 26 years old.
Isn’t that incredible?
I don’t take for granted that I get to say I lived another year.
Especially after the past two years, with this pandemic and too many lives just taken. And also, my anorexia almost killed me at 24 years old.
So, does life at 26 years old look exactly like I pictured it as a kid?
Not exactly.
When I was little, I remember dreaming of what my 20s would be like, and specifically, I had this fixation on 26. I just liked the sound of that age.
At 26 years old, my 10-year-old self thought she would have her apartment in New York City, and she would be working for herself or working in a school in New York City. She also pictured having her first baby at 26.
She thought friends would be coming over frequently, and dinner dates with her boyfriend or husband would be a tradition on Friday nights.
She felt the gym would be her happy place, and she would be running marathons all the time because that’s what former college athletes do, right?
While life today doesn’t look exactly like my 10-year-old self pictured it, I wouldn’t trade it for the world.
That may sound cliché, but at 26, I’m okay with clichés.
In reality, this is what 26 years old looks like for me.
I still live at home with my parents. I am grateful they still allow me to live there. It’s a beautiful home, and it’s across the street from the water…not complaining.
I am in a relationship; we have been together going on four years. We’re saving up to move out, but hey, New York is a lot more expensive than my 10-year-old self was aware.
I am self-employed working as a private practice therapist, and I also coach basketball, not in a New York City school, but at the high school I attended on Long Island.
I have a lot of dreams and plans for my work. Since I was little, I have always felt a strong desire to help others somehow.
So, slowly but surely, I am figuring out my role and what message and change I am here to bring. I know writing is a part of my purpose because it’s always been there for me, and telling stories and sharing my thoughts on these pages has always felt natural and right.
And as for the other ideas I have, well, you will have to wait and see.
I’m not yet a mom, but I would be lying if I said that’s not on my mind. My body has gone through a lot in the past few years. My priority has been healing it and making it strong again. And what I constantly remind myself is I can’t have a baby in a sick body.
I went to treatment for Anorexia in September 2020. That was definitely not planned. But, going to treatment was the beginning of healing my body and mind. Since then, I have been trying each day to stay on the path of recovery; it looks different for me every day.
Today, recovery at 26 looks like having a routine but leaving room for spontaneity, doing yoga every morning, praying, keeping my heart open to love and possibilities, belly laughing often, and eating chocolate chip cookies on my birthday.
As for my relationship with exercise, that’s taken some twists and turns. I have had an exercise addiction for as long as I can remember.
But today, at 26, I try my best to do right with my body. This looks like taking rest days and not making every workout I do be the most challenging workout ever. But, I also switch up my workouts and strive to enjoy them rather than use them as punishment to change and “fix” my body.
I haven’t run a marathon yet, but I ran my first 10K race in new York city this past fall, which felt incredible to see my body and mind do.
I plan to run a half-marathon this coming fall because I can, not because I have to.
I truly don’t know what this year has in store… but I’m still going to tell you some of my wishes…because I don’t believe telling your wishes won’t let them come true, I believe more in speaking them into existence and taking action on them.
My wish for 26 is to continue to choose myself every day and constantly remind myself how incredible I am, and how proud I am for being where I am on my journey.
My wish for 26 is to laugh, laugh, and laugh some more.
My wish for 26 is to be kind to others and myself when things feel sticky and hard.
My wish for 26 is to not do recovery perfectly… just to show up and try my best every day and, well, my best certainly changes every day.
My wish for 26 is to love those around me and keep my heart open to feel them loving me back.
My wish for 26 is to keep writing and continue telling my story because it matters, and I matter, and well, I guess that’s also my wish for 26…to never forget how much I matter.
