The 5 Stages of Love: Why Too Many Stop at Stage 3
Stage three is an opportunity to love and appreciate our partner, to shift from the expectation of “ideal mate.”
We all want real, lasting love, whether we are in our 20’s, 30’s, 40’s, 50’s, or beyond. Yet too many marriages fall apart and most people don’t know why. They mistakenly believe that they have chosen the wrong partner. After going through the grieving process, they start looking again. But after more than forty years as a marriage and family counselor, I have found that most people are looking for love in all the wrong places. They don’t understand that Stage three of the five stages of love is not the end, but the real beginning for achieving real, lasting love:
Stage 1: Falling in Love
Falling in love is nature’s trick to get humans to pick a mate so that our species carries on. It feels so wonderful because we are awash in hormones such as dopamine, oxytocin, serotonin, testosterone, and estrogen. Falling in love also feels great because we project all our hopes and dreams onto our lover. We imagine that they will fulfill our desires, give us all the things we didn’t get as children, deliver on all the promises our earlier relationships failed to fulfill…
