Filling the Urge to Create Every Day
Two weeks ago, I took on the daily habit to write. As an author, you wouldn’t think this would be earth shattering, but in a sense, it has been. I didn’t realize just how much stuff I’ve been keeping bottled up in this little noggin of mine. Stuff that has nothing to do with my story (but who knows, maybe it does and the opportunity just hasn’t presented yet).
I haven’t gotten more than 600 words written on my second novel in this time frame, but I can feel it’s coming. Have you ever had that feeling? Where you know you’ll be doing something soon, but for this moment, you’re just not ready; not completely done brewing?
One of the interesting things that’s happened over these two weeks is the new urge to want to create; in a physical sense. As in, get my hands messy, shuffle some dust about, and craft a piece of art that moves me.
Often times, as a solopreneur, we are problem driven. What problem exists that we can solve?? But after a while, this mindset begins to feel forced because you’re always looking for the angle that will get your foot in the door.
Art isn’t like that, at least not in the traditional business sense. Art is there to fill the void you have inside. That’s the problem it solves.
We were never meant to work ourselves to the bone and die without true purpose. Through our expression of the reality as we see it, we find the meaning we’ve been searching for. Purpose is not an external force, but an internal drive. The more in tune we become to our inner workings, the closer we come to ΓΝΩΘΙ ΣΑΥΤΟΝ (Know Thyself) and purpose becomes inevitable.
I feel as though I’m on an exploration of myself this year. I’m sifting through the fragments of myself so I can pull in the pieces I admire, aspire to, and enjoy and dump the shit that no longer serves me in a way that brings joy into my daily life.
It’s weird how long it takes to shake the confines of the societal BS we’ve all had ingrained in us since we were kids. I’ve worked on my own for years, but it’s only been the last two where I embraced it headlong and fought to be my own boss. In the process, I’ve been the workaholic mom; trying to hustle every fucking minute so I could bring in money for my family. It was killing me, because even as I was working in the same room as my kids, I wasn’t present for them. But this past year something has snapped in me and I realize I don’t care about external validation of purpose (aka more money) so much as the freedom to live my life as I see fit, experience my family every single day, and play with a variety of mediums.
Art has always been a part of me because I have a long lineage of artists, writers, and designers. I grew up in a house where there was always a canvas set up and paint strewn across a special art table. My mother’s a painter and I can’t remember a single day when there wasn’t some part of her soul that was trying to escape through her brush. It was her catharsis, I realize now. It was her way of dealing with the harshness of her world at the time, as she tried to bring beauty out of the chaos.
As I view society today, I can’t help but believe the depression rates would plummet if we stopped worshiping the almighty dollar and got back to creating from our hearts. When did we stop valuing the immense beauty in a painting, or the amazing feats of a sculpture, or structural engineering accomplishment? Why as a whole, do we no longer feel the written word has power to heal and change us? Because it does.
My advice to you, the person who’s looking for more from this world, as I am — the one who is look looking for a way to shake the cobwebs from their soul and find beauty again — start to create. Everyday.
I honestly don’t care what it is. Paint, draw, write, dance, build, sing.
Pour your soul into it and let it be crap. Don’t fear perfection because you’ll never reach it. Pour your heart into it and watch how transcendent the practice becomes.
It’s been two weeks for me, and I’m already seeing clearer. I can’t wait to look back at the one-year mark to see all that’s transpired.
Today, I’m inspired. Not only to write, but to create. To get my hands dirty and pull beauty from the ether into physical form. I don’t know what I’ll create yet, but I do know it will be the start of something wonderful.
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Carissa Andrews is a Multipassionate MN Entrepreneur, Sci-fi Author, freelance writer, graphic designer and artist, unapologetic progressive, Lightworker, truthsayer, and occasional badass. Her YA science fiction novel Pendomus, is available now through Amazon. Though she’s often a headless chicken, occasionally, she has openings for freelance gigs. It never hurts to ask.
You can learn more about her on her website at: www.carissaandrews.com