Polyamory, Seduction, and Romance
Polyamory Isn’t an Either/Or — and That’s Why It’s Romantic as Hell
The odd thing about love is that it isn’t finite. Love is actually rather exponential in nature, in that the more we love, the more we practice loving and learn how to love, the more abundant it becomes as we reinforce patterns of behavior which are loving behaviors. We shouldn’t hoard love, we shouldn’t smother it, control it, nor stifle it. We should allow it to play freely amongst others who love as we love, and we should extend freedom in love to others who love differently than we love.
In monogamy, I missed out on a lot of things about my partners, largely because I shut myself and the relationships I was in off to such things, usually by default, and turned away from them — things like my partners’ deep and real desire to, say, sleep with other people or develop a different kind of relationship dynamic than the one I offered. These were very real parts of my partner that I ignored, and beyond that, some of the most authentic and real parts of those people.
I closed myself off to the parts of my partners that I was afraid of and lost any sense of interaction or engagement with those massive pieces of my partners’ lives because of it. My fear conquered me, so I conquered my fear, and thankfully, I don’t have to live…
