First Grade Reading Strategies That Improved My Parenting

Extract the best tips and lessons from the dusty books on your shelves

My shelf was full. Books neatly lined up by size. Mostly fiction, but several parenting and family books were waiting to be cracked open. Unfortunately, as a full-time teacher and mother of four who is married to a business traveler, the books often took a back seat to more pressing concerns.

I knew there were some good tips waiting, and maybe even some life-changing solutions on that shelf, but reading through hundreds of pages for a few tips was not penciled in on the family calendar. I was becoming a tired nag. I wanted to mentor rather than dictate. I needed some fresh ideas.

The inspiration I needed came as I sat in the teacher’s chair at the semicircle table with first graders during group-reading time. I had fifteen minutes a day to teach phonics, comprehension, and squeeze in a bit of reading as these students rotated in and out of my station.

Time was limited, but we persisted with small steps every day. We used sticky notes, pencils, and highlighters. We read. We wrote. We discussed characters and their choices. We learned valuable lessons.

We always wrote while we read. We kept our notes in our books so we wouldn’t forget our ideas for tomorrow’s lessons. Gradually, I taught my students how to use books as tools instead of trophies. I taught them to isolate and reflect on the most cogent parts of books.

Why wasn’t I using these same book techniques at home with my kids?

Inspired, I let go of reading parenting books from beginning to end. I searched for the topics I needed help with and took a direct route to those pages, grabbed a pen, read, and underlined. I wrote ideas in the margins and on the inside covers. I folded pages or bookmarked whole sections so I would not waste time searching for the same information if I needed it in the future.

I also looked at children’s picture books in a whole new light. Reading a bedtime story could be so much more than a quest to get to the end and tuck in the kids. What if we used sticky notes at home as bookmarks even in the simplest bedtime story? What if we wrote questions for discussion topics on the inside cover of the books?

What are the kids predicting will happen next?

What do they think of the choice a character made?

How would they end a story differently?

Talking about books as a family gives us the opportunity to practice and find comfort in having conversations — a foundation that is especially needed as the teen years approach. There were lessons to learn from these books. What better way to mentor kids than by sharing ideas and solutions while reading together?

As an extra perk, leaving notes and questions inside a children’s book is a treasure for those who will read it next, whether that is a future grandchild or someone who picks it up at a local thrift store.

I also marked up books for talking with kids about money, finances, friends, sex, drugs, and peer pressure. I highlighted useful vocabulary and wording that I could revisit, instead of awkwardly talking with them off the top of my head.

Books are wonderful tools full of tips for parents, and lessons for mentoring children. Going at them with a specific goal in mind and a pen in hand is a great way to unlock their potential without feeling intimidated and burdening your busy schedule.

Write in them. Learn from them. Bond over them.

Kristin Buchtel lives in Denver and enjoys traveling, hiking, and a glass of red wine with her husband, and four adult children. She is a grandmother, a former teacher, and the award-winning author of Noteworthy Parenting: How to Use Your Own Ideas to Create Your Parenting Roadmap. Kristin’s passion is to inspire parents to find and embrace their own unique ways of parenting. You can find Kristin on Facebook and Instagram @noteworthyparenting, or at NoteworthyParenting.com