My Son’s Optimism For the Future Continues to Amaze Me
Despite all the changes and the scary situations throughout the pandemic, my son feels safe and secure
“Ready for today’s ice breaker?” my husband asked.
Paul, my husband, our thirteen-year-old son Ryan, and I were seated at the table. Dinner had always been our family’s time to chat about our days. Even though we now spent all day under the same roof — Paul was leading virtual training sessions downstairs, Ryan was attending his virtual middle school classes at his desk in his bedroom upstairs, and I was right across the hall from Ryan, trying to write — it still felt important to continue our tradition of recapping our days.
Ice breakers were one way Paul tried to get to know his new colleagues, to try to connect to individuals he had yet to meet in person, and go beyond his training guidelines and make the training sessions personal. Plus, they now served as a fun addition to Paul’s nightly dinner share. The ice breakers were generally open-ended, would you rather questions and we found some of them entertaining and some quite thought-provoking.
“Okay, I’m ready for it,” Ryan replied and looked intently at Paul.
“Would you rather have one wish now or three wishes in ten years?”
Paul and I looked across the table at each other and waited for Ryan’s response. We always let him answer first, not wanting to influence his reply one way or another.
“I’d rather have three wishes in ten years,” Ryan quickly replied.
“Really? You don’t mind waiting?” I asked.
“No, the time will go fast. And I might even forget about it. So then when the time comes, the three wishes will be like this big surprise,” Ryan said.
Ryan didn’t know it, but his response soothed my heart and made me feel good. Here was a flashing neon sign that our son was okay — more than okay. Here was the confirmation I needed that despite all the changes and the scary situations, Ryan felt safe and secure. After a year-and-a-half of distance learning, masked walks to our favorite neighborhood cafe for smoothies to go, and celebrating holidays with grandparents over FaceTime, Ryan was okay. More than that: he was optimistic, positive, and confident.
Ryan turned to me. “What would you say?”
“I’d take one wish now,” I said.
“And what did you say?” he asked as he looked at Paul.
“I also said I’d take one wish now,” Paul said.
It amazed me, honestly, that Ryan would wait. He’s a patient kid but if Covid has taught us anything, it’s that things can change radically and overnight, and not always for the better. As a family, we could no longer plan for a few months out, let alone ten years from now. No one could have predicted the global pandemic that enveloped our planet and changed life for everyone, everywhere. And yet it happened.
We still don’t know what the future holds, more so than ever. We don’t know how or for how long we’ll continue to navigate this world of physical distancing and mask-wearing and hand sanitizing. Still, with all that uncertainty, Ryan is hopeful for a future that would grant him three wishes. And if he’s hopeful, it makes me believe that no matter how everything works out, it will be okay.
More than okay.
Wendy Kennar is a freelance writer who has lived her entire life within the same zip code. She was a public school teacher for twelve years until a chronic medical condition made it necessary to leave her teaching career. She is constantly amazed and inspired by her young son.
Her writing has appeared in numerous publications and anthologies including the Los Angeles Times, Christian Science Monitor, United Teacher, and L.A. Parent. In addition, she is a regular contributor at MomsLA.com. She writes at wendykennar.com.
