May Book Review: Blow Your House Down: A Story of Family, Feminism and Treason
Joni Schers is a Bookstagramer from the Netherlands. With two degrees in English Literature, she talked to us about her passion for books, the way they connect her to the world, and about Blow Your House Down, by Gina Frangello.
“Reading connects people. In a world so divided by war and politics, a good story can bring people together. To me, there’s something so intimate about reading because you get to access someone else’s mind” starts Joni Schers when talking about her love for books. When she’s reading, she feels connected to the world in ways she can’t explain.
“It’s as if I’m breathing the very air of generations before me. It makes me feel utterly alive”. Never really fitting in with the kids from the neighborhood in her childhood, books were always an escape. She would look for stories with characters like her, and feel less lonely.
A little family of book fanatics all over the world
Joni grew up in a small city in the south of the Netherlands and still lives there today, in a tiny apartment she shares with her two cats, Lorelai and Cinnamon. She has two degrees in English Literature, with a special focus on writing and communicating about narratives in the digital age.
The Bookstagram account started in March 2020. At first, it was simply a very practical way for her to keep track of the books she was reading, her thoughts on them, and a way to get new recommendations.
Now though, it’s become like a little family of book fanatics all over the world. “There are not many people in my direct surroundings who love to talk about literature. Bookstagram really opened up a new world for me. Over the months, my page has combined reviews with aesthetics, which challenges me to be creative every single day. I love to play with light and shadows. I want people to look at my photos and feel nostalgic for times past”.
Joni reads about 30 books a year. She likes to sit with one for a while and write out her thoughts on it.
Her favorite book of all time is The Waves by Virginia Woolf. “There’s nothing like it; it’s so poetic and creative. You can read it over and over again and find something new and profound every single time. I love authors like Woolf who found/find new ways to work with language”.
Women Who Run with the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estès is her personal bible on how to live an abundant life; the combination of myth, folklore and modern retellings really works for her.
Finally, Joni wrote her master’s thesis on female flânerie (a concept that has been masculine by definition) and during that time, delved into Nightwood by Djuna Barnes. “I grew to love for its bold questioning of heteronormative lifestyles”.
The draw of memoirs: unflinching truth-bombs
But for our monthly book review, Joni chose none of those three all-time favorites. She went with Blow Your House Down, by Gina Frangello.
Right from the start, the title spoke to her. And when she saw that it was written by Gina Frangello, an author that she’d grown to love for the Other Voices magazine (from which she is the Executive Editor), it was decided.
“I have a soft spot for memoirs; the unflinching truth-bomb kind. I love words that grab me by the throat. In the very first paragraph, the author writes, “A is for Adulteress, Agent of Ruin. Women.” BAM! It drew me in completely. What’s really refreshing and unique to me is to read a feminist memoir where the author takes her own adultery as a vantage point. I’ve never read anything like it before” explains Joni.
In this memoir, Gina Frangello explores the demise of her marriage in detail, culminating in an adulterous relationship with a musician. Throughout the story, she takes full responsibility for her actions. But she also makes clear that she has the right to leave her husband and live an abundant life with the man she fell for.
The story also dives into the role of Frangello as a mother, as a caregiver daughter, literary professional and, eventually, patient.
“What these storylines contribute, I think, is that they help reinforce the author’s role as someone who has always done what society expected of her. From the outside, it seemed she had a perfect life. She’s always colored within the lines. This has become her problem”.
Rawness, feminism and coloring outside the lines
For Joni, the book’s strengths are in its rawness. It’s unflinching honesty. “It takes strength to look yourself in the eye while telling your story and to not look away when you don’t like yourself very much”.
For her, Gina Frangello doesn’t use euphemisms or downplay any situation. “She’s standing tall in both her successes and failures and I admire her for that”.
Joni is not often shocked, yet oftentimes she sat reading with her mouth wide open. The brutal honesty somehow made her hang on to her every word.
For Joni, the book is definitely feminist. The author explores how women’s lives and experiences are shaped by misogyny
“Not just in marriage, but also in motherhood and the sensations we as women feel within our own bodies. It’s a very insightful read, backed up by research. Frangello fights for a life where she feels fulfilled as a mother, woman, sexual being. Where many before her have stayed in unhappy situations because they were safe, she chose to color outside the lines.
“Using your own adultery and taking that as a vantage point for researching systemic misogyny is daring, to say the least.”
The story of a woman choosing herself
Joni loved every page. She really appreciated the author’s good sense of humor, who never shies away from making fun of herself. For her, the story is so much more than just a story of how a marriage declined.
Even if the subject of adultery is not something you’re interested in, she would still recommend reading the book. For her, the overarching theme of systemic misogyny and how the author dives into several male-female relationships make this book very worthwhile.
“It’s an exploration of how misogyny still permeates most relationships in life and how we’re not always aware of it. It’s a story of one woman breaking through those systems, choosing herself; a story of a woman, at first unconsciously, but later very consciously, blowing her house down, to build it up from the ground again”.
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